Nightmares

Hide 'n Seek

,, Dad!" I screamed, but he didn't turn around. He just stood there, back turned to me. Every time I tried to run towards him the world seemed to expand between us, moving him farther and farther away from me the faster a ran. So I stopped running and just stood there, my Dad being so close and yet so far away. If my arm was just some inches longer, I could grab his Shirt. The same shirt he wore on that day, the same scent he had, the same outfit. ,, Dad, please! Please tell me what to do!" I screamed again. I don't even know why I screamed, he was right in front of me and I know my dad wasn't hard of hearing. Still, I felt like I had to scream, I had to make myself heard or I would forever be silenced. Now I noticed that we were standing in the woods, in front of an old Van. The front windows were smashed in and the hood had something smeared on it, but I could make something out: the Anarchy symbol. Why was this the only thing I could make out? Why is this so important, why is this the only thing I can make out, why is it so perfect in the imperfection around it? And then my father moved, he stepped closer to the car and put his hand on the hood, right on the anarchy symbol. With a smile, he turned towards me, still his hand on the small symbol. ,, Don't give up now Seanie-boy, you finally found it.". Found...it? ,, What? What do you mean? What did I find?" I asked now, hysterically and afraid he wouldn't answer me. But he just smiled and moved his hand slowly over the symbol. ,, I won't come back Sean, but you found something more important and amazing than I could ever give you, something that you should never lose and treasure with everything you have.". What's going on, what is he talking about? But I won't ever find out, then in the next moment, he was gone, just the old hood of the car still there. I felt my body slowly grow tired and my knees giving in, so I stretched my hands towards the hood. But I could reach it, like Dad it was too far away. ,, I got you." Someone said behind me and held me before I reached the ground. I didn't see who it was, I was just so tired and closed my eyes. ,,I promise I will always catch you, sweetheart."

,,Good morning Sean" Cassidy said and held a cup of coffee towards me as I walked up to the kitchen from my tent. I grabbed the cup and drank it in one sip, even though that was a terrible decision because I nearly choked on that. ,, Wow, slow down, what's the rush?" Cassidy asked and took the cup out of my hand.,, Nightmare, need to wake up." I got out after coughing my lungs out. ,,I tell yall, that's the government slowly trying to control our thoughts." Penny said, but I already walked towards the trail leading to the lake. When I arrived at the lake, I kneeled down and splashed water in my face. ,,Fuck, that's colder than I thought." I mumbled and looked at my reflexion. ,,You look like a tired hippie....great, you fit right in here." ,,That is not true, we are all way prettier than you.". I nearly fell over into the lake when I heard someone talk right behind me. I turned around and looked at Hannah, standing there with crossed arms and a frown on her face. ,,What...What are you doing here?" ,,I saw you rush down here and though you wanted to drown yourself or something, so I wanted to save you before Finn loses someone else he cares about.". Hannah and caring about me wasn't adding up, so I just frowned back at her and slowly stood up, wiping off some water on my face. She rolled her eyes and sighed a bit annoyed, than uncrossed her arms. ,,I mean it, you looked like you were rushing here to be miserable about something and I wanted to make sure you were okay." ,,Since when do you care about me? You hate me." ,,I don't hate you!" she said immediately, than breathed in. ,,I don't hate you Sean, I am just careful letting people in. Enough people are just joining up with us for cash or because they wanna hook up with Finn. And than they disappear. I just don't wanna let people in before I know who they are, but Finn insist on letting everybody tag along whoever they are. And Cassidy is mostly agreeing with him.". That...made some sense, actually. Finn's nature was probably making him vulnerable to being hurt this way. He wanted to help people however he could, didn't judge them in any way. That was...kinda sad. How often was he just used for money and sex without any feeling, him being the only one to care? ,,So you think I am just using you guys and Finn for...money?" ,,Aren't you? You just tagged along after Finn offered you the job here. After we move on, you and Daniel will be gone. And Finn will be heartbroken again.". ...She had a point, we really just tagged along because of the money. She had every reason to distrust me. ,,Hannah...I am not using you. You are right, I came with you because of the job. And you have every reason to distrust me or Daniel. But I care for Finn and everyone else and I really think that Daniel wants to stay with you all too. So please, give me a chance to prove myself.". Hannah was quiet for a time, not saying anything and just moving her weight from one foot to another. ,,You know that he trusts you to stay, like he trusted everybody else?"She than asked and looked me straight in the eyes. Now, she justed seemed tired. How often did she watch Finn be heartbroken over someone? How often did she pull him up just to see him break down again? How often was she the only person he trusted with everything he had? ,,I know. And I wont break that trust."