Thinking Out Loud || #Wattys2015

31: Anger Managment.

*so I decided to skip ahead and give you a quick summary. Camila and Lauren are in a rough patch after the loss of the baby. Lauren and Camila got into a fight about Lauren and Mandy kissing. Lauren and Mandy got into a fight about Mandy telling Camila about it and making it look as it Lauren kissed Mandy when it was really the other way around. Lauren threatens to cheat on Camila if she didn't cut her shit out. Lauren hit Camila. Camila hit Lauren in the face first which caused Lauren to hit her. At this point in the story Camila is trying to make things work where as Lauren doesn't care anymore. And is working on her anger management. In the story it is a week before Christmas. Ok enjoy reading*

Lauren's POV

I sat in the dark walked office waiting for my doctor or therapist to come in to talk to me. Once she did we sat in silence for a while before we began talking.

"So Lauren what gets you angry? Or what has been getting you angry lately? Our last session was in late July and you're back again." Olivia said sitting back in her chair.

"Lately. My girlfriend. My parents. But mostly my girlfriend." I confessed not making eye contact.

"How so with your girlfriend?" She questioned looking at me.

I took a breath and thought about our last argument when she hit me and I hit her back.

"We don't act like we love or are in love with each other anymore. Almost like we hate each other. A few days ago we got into an argument and she hit me in the face...."

"Did you counter?" She asked.

"Yeah. I hit her back. She started crying and that broke me. It actually pissed me off even more. How can you hit me. Like she didn't slap me she punched me in my lip dead in the face. I slapped her and she starts crying. You can't cry when you punched me first. I mean I raged out. I trashed my room. I called her every name in the book. My mom had to carry me out my room so I wouldn't do anything else. It's just been fight after fight. But that was our worst." I explained looking down then back to her.

"Well Lauren. It seems that if she is a big part of your anger you need to let her go at least until you get yourself under control." She suggested.

"I tried that but I can't not since the baby died." I mumbled.

"Are you angry at yourself?" Olivia asked me. I shrugged and searched for an answer.

"Sometimes I guess. I mean I take it out on others though." I confessed shrugging looking at her.

"Have you ever thought of doing a sport that you can put your anger into?" She asked. "Besides soccer or basketball?"

"Well no what other sports are there that you can do that with?"

"Boxing? You like to hit things....." She mentioned.

"I thought about that...at this point I just want to control my anger not put it into something else."

"Ok well let's go over things then...."

---
Lauren walked down into her room and saw every trophy or medal back in place. Pictures re-framed. The bathroom door opened and Camila walked out in sweats with a towel on her head. Lauren was looking at a picture of herself and Camila. The younger of the two on her back and then sharing a kiss. She sighed and picked up the frame and looked at the picture closely.

"How'd it go today?" Camila asked towel drying her hair.

"You know how they say if you love something let it go and if it was meant to be it'd come back but if it doesn't than it never was?" The green eyed girl said her eyes never leaving the picture.