I woke up fairly early the next morning, ten thirty. I showered and got ready for the day then went back out to my room and cleaned up a little.
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I had to resume school tomorrow as it will be Monday and we have like three weeks left before we're done so I was saying fuck it to online classes. Plus it will be fun to cause trouble I'm school, so many more punishments, I just want to test my limits. Once I was satisfied with my room I went downstairs and noticed the door to the basement was open a little so I went over to close it but heard a guitar softly being played. I looked around to see who wasn't here and of course it was Ashley. But I went down anyways and quietly shit the door behind me and went down the stairs keeping quiet. I recognized the song imediatly as Lost It All and when it got back around to the singing part I joined in making him jump a little but relax once I came over and sat next to him. Once the song was done he set the guitar down and smiled over at me. "When did you get up?" He asked. I shrugged, "I dunno, somewhere around ten thirty-ish." I said and he nodded. He leaned down and connected his lips with mine making my stomach do flips as I kissed him back. "Ash..." I sighed, pulling away. He nodded, "I know, I know I'm sorry. I just can't resist you." He said, moving away from me a little. I just nodded because it was hard for me to resist him too. I bit my lip as I looked up at him to see him looking at the table seeming to be in thought. My eyes glanced down to his lips and I forced myself to look away and I sighed. "Maybe we should just like-" he started. "Not be around each other that much? I mean other than around everyone else." He said. That sounded like a good idea so I nodded, "Yeah, that would help." I said. He smiled a little at me and I returned it. I got up and let out a breath as I went back upstairs to see the door open a crack. I closed it, I'm sure I did. I most definitely did, someone was up and listening. But they couldn't have known what we were talking about unless they could see us. And I would've heard them come down the stairs so they didn't see shit. I closed the door as I came back up and leaned against it, sighing. I looked over to see that Dad, Inna, Jake, and Ella were up and looking over at me. "What's wrong?" Dad asked. I shook my head, "Nothing." I muttered and heard to the stairs. "Well fuck. What happened this time? You and Ashley just got good again." Jake said. "We're not fighting, and there's nothing wrong." I said and went up to my room and shut and locked the door. I went and sat in the edge of the bed, thinking. I wanted to be around him so badly, I wanted to be in his arms and kissing him not staying away from each other. A knock came at the door pulling me from my thoughts as dad came in. "What happened? Both of you are all bummed out again." He said and sat beside me. I just shook my head, "Nothing happened, we just had a little agreement and it's not something either of us are happy about is all." I said shrugging. "Then why did you agree to it?" He asked. "Because it was necessary." I said. He just shrugged and nodded, giving me a side hug and kissing the top of my head. "I'm here if you want to talk." He said. I nodded as he left and closed the door behind him. This was bullshit. I wanted him and he wanted me so I really don't know why we were doing this. It's fucking stupid, and I'm not doing this shit. Just as I was about to get up and go down to him my door opened to show Inna and Ella. They had knowing smiles as they came over. "We know what happened." Inna said. "Why wouldn't you tell us? It's an important piece of information to know you guys kissed." Ella whined. I shrugged, "Because we made a little agreement that it wasn't going to happen again and for now, we're staying away from each other except for around you guys." I explained. "Why?" Inna asked. "Because as of right now, whenever we're around each other shit happens that can't happen." I said knowing they knew what I meant. "Bye why though? You know we've watched both of you suffer for years, why when you get somewhere are you stopping now?" Ella said. "There's a lot more that goes into it than you think. We both know that, so we did what we had too." I said softly, tears threatening to form but I forced it down. They sighed and nodded at the same time. "I guess that makes sense then." Inna said. I nodded, "Yeah." I whispered. They both hugged me before they walked back out. Well shit, now that I explained it to them I know I can't go back down there. This sucks so bad. I heard my name being called by many people downstairs and jumped before getting up and going down to them. They were all in the living room again except Ashley, all of them awake and the basement light was still on so I knew he was down there. "What?" I asked, going over and getting some water before going back and sitting criss crossed on the couch next to CC and Jake. "What happened? Cuz he won't leave the basement right now." Jinxx said. My eyes flicked up to Inna and Ella and I rose an eyebrow, silently asking if they said anything. Both of them shook their heads and I sighed. "I dunno." I mumbled. "Angel come on, we know both of you better than that. And we're not stupid, so what happened?" Jake said. I just chewed on my bottom lip in thought. I couldn't say anything obviously, but thinking of a lie to cover it in an instant was harder than it should've been. "Angel just tell them." Inna whispered but loud enough for all of us to hear without a problem from how quiet it was. "You know?" Dad asked and she and Ella nodded. "No." I said and stood up, going over to the basement and going down to him. He was still on the guitar but wasn't playing anything, just sitting there. "What do we do?" I asked, sitting across from him. "What do you mean?" He asked. "Them. They're all on my ass about something being wrong." I said. He shrugged and messed with the guitar. "Well something is wrong." He said. But it didn't sound like he was talking about us so I quickly got worried. "Ash...what's wrong?" I asked gently. He didn't say anything so of course my eyes instantly flicked down to his wrist. But they were covered by a sleeve, he doesn't like wearing shit with sleeves on it that often. I grabbed his hand and pulled his arm to me but before I could get a look he yanked away. I stood, tears filling my eyes. He didn't. He wouldn't, not again. "Angel i-" he started but I shook my head quickly and headed up the stairs quickly, hearing him following me. "Angel-" Ashley started as we got to the top and i opened the door. "No, that's not fair Ashley. You can't go and do the exact thing you're telling me not to!" I said as a couple tears fell. "What is going on?" Dad said but neither of us answered. I just made sure I had my phone and went outside hearing him following me. I got outside and he grabbed my arm and stopped me. "Why? Why would you do that again? I thought you were okay. I thought everything was good again." I said, wiping away a tear. He sighed, "I don't know okay? I don't know. It was just there, and I didn't think." He explained softly and ran a hand through his hair. "Why wouldn't you come talk to me? I'm right here. I'm always right here." I said. He shrugged a little, "I don't know. You've had a lot going on for awhile it's just not worth it and it's not fair for me to dump my problems on you." He said. I took a breath and shook my head, "I don't care how much I have going on, you being safe and happy is more important than any of it. You'll ways be more important than any of it." I said, my voice falling as I spoke. "I'm sorry Angel. God I'm so sorry." He said amd I saw tears filling in his eyes. I quickly went over and wrapped my arms around him tightly. "It's okay." I whispered as he hugged me back and tears fell. "I didn't mean it." He whispered after a second and we pulled away. "It's okay, everything's gonna be okay. Where is it?" I asked and he bit his lip and didn't say anything. "Ash I can't let you keep it. You know that." I said softly. He nodded and took a deep breath before taking of a chain that was around his neck and pulling the end out of his shirt that had a razor blade attached. He was hesitant to give it over so I took it gently and threw it as far from both of us as I could. "Do you have anymore?" I asked. He shook his head and I eyes him for a second before nodding, he didn't. "What now?" He asked. "Let's go back inside." I said. He nodded and we went in. "Is everything okay?" Jinxx asked as soon as we walked in. I glanced over at Ashley who was obviously holding back tears. "It will be." I answered and we both went back upstairs and to my room. "Can we talk later maybe?" Ashley asked hopefully while I kicked off my shoes. I nodded, "Yeah sure." I said and we went over to my bed and both of us got in and laid down, me cuddling up to him like I always do. "You know I'm always going to be here for you right?" I whispered, lacing his fingers with mine. He nodded, "I know." He whispered back and kissed the top of my head. "Angel you haven't done anything lately have you?" He asked quietly. I shook my head, "No." I said softly, letting my eyes drift closed while he held me tighter to him and ran his fingers gently through my hair. I looked up at him to see a thoughtful look on his face and a couple tears in his eyes. But I don't think they ever left. I gently kissed his cheek, getting his attention. "Stop thinking about it. It's okay, we're both gonna be okay." I said. He took a deep breath and let it out, nodding. "Yeah.", He breathed and his eyes flicked down to my lips. So of course me being me and completely okay with that, leaned up a little and pressed my lips against his. He kissed back without hesitation, his grip on me tightening a bit. He pulled away and I rested my head on his chest, my eyes drifting closed. "Thank you Angel." He whispered. I didn't know what he was thanking me for, or why, but I didn't get a chance to ask before I fell asleep. ___________________
