don't be shy

act eight, scene two

I'm in actual shock. How could he be like this? A part of me wants to believe this is a prank but i know it's not. I was just lying to myself about him. He's just like ever other male on then planet. I shut off my phone and put it to the side. I didn't know what to do anymore. So i curled up into a ball and cried. And cried. My brother hates me, my dad probably hates me and i feel like i'm a slut. I feel so used. I hate this.

There was a knock at my door and my mam enters slowly, unsure if i'm still awake. As soon as she sees me cry, she runs over to comfort me. "Oh dear, what's wrong?" She softly asks, stroking my hair. "I hate men." I answer in a sob. "Oh honey, don't we all. Is this about Max? You know he doesn't mean it." This made me cry more. Max hates me right now, normal when i'm sad i would always go hang with him. However, since i've been alone, i've had to deal with my issues alone and not distract myself. "No, it's not." I confess to her. I knew i could tell my mam anything, she would never judge me. "Oh what's wrong? Is it about Ciaran?" Of course she knew who it was about, it is pretty obvious. "I don't want you to hate me." I tell her, knowing she would never in a million years, i'm just vulnerable at this moment. "I could never darling." She reassures me. So i tell her everything. It felt good that i could tell someone about this, not lying anymore to her.

"I knew he didn't look like a psychologist" my mam states, causing me to chuckle. "I feel so used." I whisper to her, tears had stopped now. "He doesn't deserve you. Anyone would be lucky to have you. I'm proud of you, not for lying, no. But for being confident in yourself. I love you darling. Don't ever feel ashamed. Men are terrible." I always need a speech from my mam. It always makes me feel better, yes she'll shout at me but she knows what she's talking about. "He also said your cooking was bad." I confess to her, might as well get it out there. "He said WHAT? Last time i invite him to dinner. Rude and disrespectful." She was a little livid now, as she should. Queen.

There was another knock at my door and Max slowly enters this time. He stands awkwardly at the door, "Ehm i'm sorry about before. I didn't mean it. I was just upset." He apologises to me, wobbling on his feet. "Im sorry too. I'm so proud of you. Ive just missed you a lot." I apologies back, i was truly proud of him. I open my arms for him to give me a hug, which he accepts and hugs me on my bed. Of course my mam had to join in and entangled herself on the hug.

It was going to be okay.