(✓) 𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐢𝐝𝐞 • [𝒅𝒂𝒏𝒊𝒆𝒍 𝒔𝒆𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒚]

nineteen.

"Daniel," his name leaves my lips.

My mind is spinning at the sight of Daniel, who I haven't seen or talked to in months.

"I was hoping I'd catch you here," he says in his classically cool fashion.

"I'll meet you upstairs," I say to Tate. She nods and heads inside with Emily. I turn back to Daniel and ask, "How did you know where I live?"

"My sister lived here last year as a freshman. I guess I was just hoping luck was on my side," he replies. "Seems like it was."

"What are you doing here, Daniel?" I continue bluntly.

"Fighting for you. For us."

"Why now? It's been almost six months, and I haven't heard from you at all," I argue. I don't know why I'm even bothering with him right now.

"I thought I'd give you some space," he explains.

"How considerate."

"Come on, Asp. You can't still be mad," he pleads.

"I can't?" I reply sharply.

"I didn't mean it like that," he relents.

"What did you mean, then?" I keep badgering him.

"Look, this is just a huge misunderstanding," Daniel says.

I can't believe the audacity of him right now. After six months, he's tracked me down late at night in the middle of New York just to tell me I made a mistake. I just want to forget everything we went through and start over. That's the whole reason I'm here.

"Really, Daniel?"

"Please, just let me explain," Daniel begs.

"I just want to go to sleep. Good ni—"

"Please," Daniel stops me. His big, blue eyes begin to water.

I sigh in frustration. Even now, I can't resist that look of his.

"Explain away, then," I say.

"First off, I'm sorry. For the millionth time, I'm sorry, and I'm always going to be," he starts. "I really messed up that night. And it's not an excuse, but I honestly don't remember a lot of what happened.

"Corbyn was having a really tough time with school, and Harlow wasn't helping by hanging around all the time. Things were getting kinda rocky between them at the time. I don't know, maybe I thought he just needed to loosen up, get his mind away from everything... including Harlow."

I pause to take in what he's saying. I can't wrap my mind around any of this. It still hurts like it just happened yesterday.

"Is that all?" I ask sharply.

Daniel stays silent, contemplating his next move. He takes one slow step toward me. I hold my breath, instantly remembering what it's like to be this close to him. I try to push the thoughts of our past away, but he's so close that his warm breath grazes my lips.

"I love you, Aspen. Always have and always will," Daniel professes, his lips inches from mine.

"I—" respond breathily.

"Say it, and I'll never let you down again," Daniel says. Both of our voices are barely above a whisper now.

I want to believe what he's saying, but I've heard this too many times before.

"I can't," I pull away.

"Asp," he groans.

"Do you know how bad you hurt me?" I ask.

"Of course, I do."

"I needed you. My dad died, and you were the person I wanted to turn to," I whimper, the tears starting to spill from my eyes.

"I wanted to be there..." Daniel says.

"But you couldn't. Because you fucked up," I say. "Do you know how many people warned me about you?"

"But you didn't listen... because you loved me," he says with a weak smile.

"Exactly, I loved you," I pause. "Past tense."

"You don't mean that," he replies sadly. I don't reply.

Daniel continues, "What does Harlow think?"

I remember how Harlow asked me to give him another chance. For some reason, no one understands that this was never about what he did to Harlow. It's that he broke my trust one too many times.

"It doesn't matter," I tell him. "And not that it's any of your business, but we're not that close anymore."

"I'm sorry to hear that," he says.

"Me too."

We linger in silence, not sure where to go from here.

"What can I do?" Daniel speaks up.

"Daniel..." I sigh, overwhelmed.

"Anything. Name it," he pleads. "I can't lose you, Aspen."

I flashback through the highs and lows of our relationship for what I hope is the last time. I rack my brain for an answer. I would love nothing more than to jump back into his heart, his head, his bed. But at what cost?

"I want to say yes..." I start.

"Then, say it. Please."

"...But I don't trust you anymore," I sigh. We're both crying at this point.

"No, no, no. Come on, we can do this," Daniel begs.

"Don't make this harder than it has to be," I say.

Daniel takes my hands, but I gently slip them away.

"Goodbye, Daniel," I say, turning away before I finish the sentence.

The short trip back to my room is blurred by the tears streaming down my face. I struggle to put the key in the door, but Tate must hear me and opens it.

"Oh, come here," she says sympathetically, pulling me into a hug.

Moments later, I pull away. "Thanks, Tate."

"Anytime," she rubs my arm kindly.

I pass a snoring Emily on my way to the bathroom, where I take my time washing off the events of the night.

When I feel as clean as I can get, I cozy up in my freshly-made bed, thankful that there's only room for one.

I feel the tears continue to fall, but instead of Daniel, I think of my dad.

"Low tide, that's where the magic happens."

God, I miss him. I think of the million and one things that could've gone differently this year. But my dad wouldn't want that for me. He would tell me that everything happens for a reason, and that life is a cycle. I've definitely hit a low this year, but that just means the high is on its way.

So, I fall asleep, tears still in my eyes but a teeny-tiny sense of hope in my heart. I'm in New York, now. I'll find a new Daniel.

Better yet, I'll find a new Aspen.

•••