Fated

Chapter 29: Spells

Xander POV:

Kaden sat across from me while I tried to get ahold of myself. We were in the cabin, it was unoccupied most the time and in the most deserted part of the territory but here for whoever needed alone time, to be away from the pack and everything else because sometimes things were just too much. We'd been running most the night but Kaden insisted we stop for a few minutes, given the sun was up.

Kaden sighed and shook his head. "Xander, you need to forgive yourself and not let this affect your date with Addie. You're a good mate, you are. This is hard. No one expected her to be a human, it definitely complicates things. Not everything is going to be perfect right away and that's okay," he shrugged. "You're an amazing Alpha and you're an amazing mate. Don't kill yourself over one mistake."

"She was so hurt, Kay," I whimpered.

"I know she was," he frowned. "And now you get to show her how good of a mate you are by fixing it. Just talk to her, dude. Tell her the truth. Her biggest hang-up with you two is that she doesn't know you, right?"

"Yeah. I mean, I think so," I nodded.

"Stop second-guessing yourself. She's told you that's what it is," he shrugged. "So tell her the truth and let her get to know you, the real you, all that stuff you keep bottled up. She's your mate, Xander. If you can't tell that stuff to your mate then who can you tell it to? You're awesome, let her see that and let her see the parts you think aren't awesome. She already cares about you. It's obvious. I don't see her walking away from you if you just open up to her about everything that happened. I think that would bring you closer."

"I don't want to scare her away," I admitted.

"You won't," he said softly. "You won't. When you let her see you, I promise she'll stay. Don't let your fear control you, don't let the past control you. She's yours and you're hers, think about how you would feel if the roles were reversed and she wouldn't be honest with you about what happened with her. Wouldn't that hurt, to not have her be open with you?"

Dammit. I hated when he made good points like that. I nodded reluctantly and he smiled.

"See? You gotta think about it like that," he said. "Every time you start to get nervous or stop trusting yourself, just explain it to her. It would be hella easier for her to understand and help next time if she knew everything. I mean, Tess is telling her some stuff but not everything. She needs to hear it from you. How can you make each other stronger if you won't admit your weaknesses to each other?"

"You're right," I sighed. "I know you're right. I'm just worried she... She won't forgive me for last night," I admitted. "For all I know, she doesn't even want to go on that date with me today."

"She does," Kaden said confidently. "She absolutely does. If for nothing else than a chance to hear what happened from you. Not from me, not from Tess. From you. Our reassurance can only go so far, dude. She needs reassurance from her mate."

I sighed and nodded, wondering how in the hell I would reassure her when I couldn't even reassure myself. It was morning now, it had been hours but I could still feel her pain and I hated myself for putting it there. I wondered if Addie was still just as upset and my answer could come from the very person I smelled approaching.

"Tap out," Tess said, walking into the cabin and gesturing back at the door. "Switch. You get to take care of slightly hung-over Luna."

Kaden smiled and stood up, setting his hand on my shoulder. "You good?"

I shrugged and nodded. He frowned but patted my back and walked out, shutting the door behind him. I didn't need to turn to see Tess's expression, I could feel it and I was pointedly avoiding it.