I Just Saw her

ELEVEN

The school had called my parents to report my absence, but they weren't angry. I told them what had happened, what was happening, and after they once again urged me to be careful, to pay attention to my surroundings and never be alone, the subject was temporarily dropped, and I was able to escape to my room.

I alternated between doodling in the margins of my math notebook, and thinking about Casey. The pillow where her head had lay just the night before was a reminder of everything that had happened in those tangled sheets.

I had wanted to kiss her since I was twelve, and I had finally done it. Everything was different between us all of a sudden and, with everything else that had happened and was still going on, it was even more overwhelming.

Casey called me at eight thirty. She never called, only texted, and never so early. I answered quickly.

"I only have a second," she said quickly.

"What's going on?" I asked, sitting up and shutting off the tv.

"He's coming tonight. I think. I don't know if it's tonight, but soon. It sounds like soon."

"What do you mean? What did he say?"

"I can't repeat it right now. I wanted to say goodbye so you wouldn't worry. It's only until it's safe for me to call you or text or something."

My blood ran cold. "Where are you going?"

"Katie is taking me away for a little bit. She told the Detective, but I'm not supposed to say where. She thinks I shouldn't say anything or text anything because we don't know if this person could hack our phones or something."

"You're leaving but I can't know where you're going?"

"I'm so sorry. I have to go. I have to pack some stuff, and then I guess we're leaving. But Patrick, I'm going to miss you."

"You're leaving now? Can I come over for just a minute?"

"You can't. Katie doesn't want anyone coming to the house in case someone's watching it."

"Casey, I'll just be -"

"It's hard enough to have this happen without having to say an actual goodbye to anyone," she snapped, then sighed. "I mean to you," she said, her voice softer. "I can't say goodbye to you right now." She sniffled. She was crying. "So, just tell me you'll miss me and we'll talk soon."

"I'll more than miss you."

"I'll more than miss you too."

After she hung up, I stared at the screen until it went dark. I knew I should be relieved that this time, people were watching for her. At least there was a plan in motion. But I wasn't.

Something didn't sit well with me. I tried to brush it off, nearly convincing myself that it was so rushed because time was running out. Katie must not have told Casey where they were going to eliminate the risk of her telling me or someone else. Maybe it made sense that only the detective knew, in case it leaked to the wrong person.

I lay back in my bed. The gnawing unease built until it couldn't be ignored. My brain was screaming for me to call her back and then, when I took no action, to get up and go now.

I considered waking up my parents and telling them where I was going, but I knew what they would say. There was no way I could get out if they knew. Without another thought, I grabbed my keys, stuffed my feet into sneakers and ran to my car.

I lectured myself on my paranoia the entire drive to Casey's house. I was embarrassing myself by showing up on a bad feeling. She would think I was insane.