One Day At A Time

Chapter 16 - Two On The Trot

The air had finally lost the warmth in it, announcing the arrival of the cold winter in Pune. Khushi arranged her dupatta, which doubled up as a scarf around her head, covering her ears as she bristled against the cold wind, her eyes watery as she sat pillion on Kabir's bike. They were on their way back home after picking up his guitar from Tony's, and Khushi sat in silence behind him carrying his black guitar case strapped across her back.

It had been hard to trust him enough to step out even for a few minutes without doubting his intentions. His wish to spend time with her had been desperate of late, desperate enough to trick her into situations at his whim. But then she remembered the look on his face as she had stood by the door of the train's carriage waving at him. His eyes had been communicating something different to her after a long time as he had waved back at her. It had almost seemed like he had finally listened to what she was saying to him all these months.

She struggled to overcome the initial trepidation and anxiety, but she was willing to take a gamble. It was an opportunity to redress everything that had gone wrong between them, and if he was being honest with her this time, she believed she would be a big fool to blow up this chance. She had to do this for them, for their beautiful friendship. And so she had played along and stepped out with him into the night. And within a few minutes of being with him, she had realised that her worries had been unfounded.

"I love that song you were humming a while ago." Kabir shouted through the traffic noise and broke into her thoughts.

"Which one?"

"I'll play it for you tomorrow. Sing with me." He said as he rode through the busy roads. "I do realise it's been a while since we had a decent conversation, let alone singing a song."

Her heart twisted when she heard him utter those words. It had indeed been months since they had had a proper conversation between them. She had been brutal with her words with him before she left for her trek and hadn't expected anything to change miraculously over a fortnight. And now this mammoth effort from his side to reestablish the missing normalcy in their relationship made her feel even more guilty although she knew it wasn't her fault. Kabir had always been a soft-hearted person, and perhaps that was the reason why it was hurting her even more because he had finally decided to make her pain bigger than his to make life easier for her.

"Kabs?" She whispered.

"Nah, don't worry about me. I am okay."

She took a blow to her heart when he said that. She knew exactly what he was going through, yet she knew she could do nothing to help him. The realisation was excruciatingly painful. Time heals everything, she had heard, but how long would he have to endure this hell? She rested her hand on his shoulder. It was a soft touch of her fingers, but it relaxed the tension in his shoulders instantly.

"I know what you are thinking, Khush. It will hurt me a lot initially, but you are with me, right? Tu sambhaalegi na mujhe?"

He was pleading more than questioning, and that tore her heart apart, and the pain was unbearable. Her fingers curled over his shirt while she held onto his shoulder. Her throat burned in a silent scream as her eyes stung and tears finally rolled down freely followed by sobs. Kabir stilled for a moment and slowed down. He took them off the main road and turned into a small lane. He stopped the bike and parked it after they both got off. For Khushi, it was almost like the dam had finally burst after holding in the guilt and helplessness together for months. She covered her face with her palms and cried her heart out, and he watched her helplessly. He raised his arm to comfort her but hesitated. His fingers rolled into tight fists and his teeth clenched as she broke down in front of him like never before.