lmaooo lemme show ya screenshots of the OTHER VERSION of ch. 40 that i was gonna post but didn't like 💀 the difference is insane !
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like if i hadn't scrapped this ^ chapter these two wouldn't have broken up and das CRAZY😭 the power ONE chapter has on a book do be mad doe
oh && also, THIS CHAPTER IS GONNA BE LONG ASAB and also not edited 😍
iwrotethischapterwhile iwashighsoimsorryifitsucks
it had been two weeks.
mattia fucked up. he knew that. he didn't really know how many times he had realized he had fucked up, he's pretty sure he realized more than once, but never when he should have.
he realized he fucked up after waking up in ayiana's room, her still sleeping in his arms, covered in scratches and hickeys that his ex-girlfriend hadn't given him.
he realized he fucked up the day kenya came back from new york, dropping her suitcase and running towards him, laughing as he picked her up and spun her around.
he realized he fucked up when he brought ayiana over to his house, remembering the look of disappointment on BOTH his mother and his father's faces as she limped out of the house a few hours later.
he realized he fucked up when taryn looked at him like she was going to kill him, whilst her sister was so happy to see him.
he realized he fucked up when kenya looked absolutely defeated over finding out that he cheated, too tired to put up an argument with him the way she normally would. he watched her heart break before his own eyes and it was all his fault.
but what made him more upset with himself was the fact that he never realized he had fucked up at the right time; before everything happened. when he put his lips on ayiana's he didn't feel even a slither of guilt and he absolutely hated that. he was so angry, so enraged over the thought of kenya cheating (when she never did), that he couldn't notice he was cheating on herat that moment.
he remembered going on the group chat after everything went down. his friends, (kairi and alejandro especially) didn't hesitate to call him out for his bullshit. robert didn't make a single joke over the situation, granted that he was extremely pissed off at mattia too. at least that answered his question, he now knew that his friends were going to keep being friends with kenya despite their breakup and he couldn't help but feel jealous of them.
