Great and Greater

Chapter 3-Everything, Nothing

So, if I keep this up, I might actually keep updating regularly if keep needing so much in way of procrastination material. haha. You never know.

Here's the next day of suffering: Friends

Song: Friends by Band Of Skulls

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Hours it seems that the spiralling continues. Endless, merciless spiralling. Round and round and round. You're cold, you're wet, your dry, you're hot. Blood gushes from gashes all over your body.

You want to die.

And then, the spinning stops. Everything settles and you can't help but feel at rest somehow. Yes, you realize, that just because the spinning is no more that by no means is the pain over, but at least the whirling has ceased. At least you can feel your feet on the ground again. At least the anticipation is over.

But then you realize where you're at. Then you realize how old you are.

You're four and you're the biggest girl in school. Ari is scrambling behind you, trying to keep up as you plod up the jungle gym. "Aerie!" she screams. "Slow down!"

"Hurry up!" you demand, taking your place at the top, pushing one boy down the side in doing so. He catches himself so you don't worry about him. "And no one disturb me!"

Of course no one would even fathom it, disturbing you. They'd never approach you, disturb you, tear you away from your all important thoughts. You're four, a kindergartener, and the queen of the playground.

"Aerie I don't like this," Ari complains.

"Then go away."

Her face falls. Ever since you realized that you could control the playground with just your eyes, something you later learn is because they change colour, you've been taking advantage of it. You've become top of the playground.

Some people have fallen to accommodate you, of course. Some people even have cuts from where the chips bit into their skin. Some people have gone home crying.

But that doesn't matter. All that matters is staying at the top of playground. All that matters is not losing that rush being in control gives you. That power trip.

A power trip, may I add, that is the same one you later fell victim to in making your decision not to run from the Bloodworths. The one that got you into this eternal damnation.

"I wanna go home!" screams a little girl sitting on the ground. Her dress is ruffled and her blonde curls have slipped from their barrettes. How'd she get like that? Well, she was pushed down when you wanted up the play structure, of course.

"Sush!" you command, mocking a television style evil queen voice. "I'm queen."

"No! You're not queen! You're just mean!" she screams, jumping to her feet, blood trickling down her knee. It unnerves you almost. "You ruined everything!" and then the little blonde girl runs away, falling a few times.

Everything. Everything. Everything.

"Aeire," Arijanna whines, pulling on your jeans, "I'm done playing queen."

"Who's playing?" you ask, standing as tall as you can on the playground, trying to see everyone and everything.

"You aren't," she frown. "You're being mean. You're ruining everything."

Everything. Everything. Everything.

"We were perfectly fine till you came along," she frowns, and slides off the jungle. In that moment that her feet hit the ground you know that you've just lost your best friend.