Simplicity

Chapter 5

I sat there staring at him blankly. That can’t be right, can it? He’d told me that he had cut off all ties with that group, now he’s telling me that the person I just saw him kissing isn’t his girlfriend but one of the people who fucked up his life. But I know him. I can see that he’s scared. He doesn’t want to fall into that dark pit again, but he’s afraid he might.

  “Isla say something.” I ran my fingers through my hair and shook my head. His face was tight and expectant; looking at me anxiously like a child who just confessed to breaking something. I suppose he did break something. He broke his promise to not only me but to himself. He’d promised that he’d never have anything to do with them again. 

  “Please Isla.”

  “How can I say anything when I don’t even know what’s going on?”

Alex stood up and started pacing, he always paced when he’s trying to think of the right words to say.

  “I don’t know if I should tell you.” He mumbled and continued “What if you get mad at me?”

 He couldn’t stop fidgeting; his hands were pulling at the sleeves.

   “I’m not going to get mad at you, Alex.”

  “But, what if I told you I’ve gone back? What if I told you that I’ve been hanging around Alyssa for a while now?” He looked over at me, his words flowing out quickly.

  “How long is a while?” I have the feeling that I’m not going to like what I hear. Maybe I should ask him more once he’s calmed down, I can see him getting frustrated. His hands are balled up in fists; his muscles tight.

  “A few months now. She came by the house and said she missed me, she said everyone missed me. I haven’t seen anyone except for her and Simon though.”

  “Are you doing drugs again?” 

He hesitated, processing the question and replying with a well thought out “Yes.” 

I let out a long, disappointed sigh and stood up. I just don’t know what to think or what to say. It’s all quite simple really but it’s a lot to take in.

  “I’m gonna go for a walk. I’ll see you later, Alex.” I grabbed my portfolio and walked out of him room, leaving his apartment and walking back towards the park.

It’s cold tonight; I can see my breath in the air puffing out like smoke. I’m not sure what to think of what’s happening with Alex, I’m angry but I’m not at the same time. I feel bad for him, he’d made it almost a year since he’d gone clean.

  “You know, it’s not safe for you to walking out here all alone at night.” The voice was familiar and matched a familiar face. It took me a second to realize it was Jasper. 

  “Well, you’re alone too.” I retorted.

  “Yes, but I’m not a girl.” He smiled. He was leaning against one of the many leafless trees lining the left side of the pavement.  He was holding a camera and his you could hear the monotone beep whenever he pressed a button. 

  “You should also be more aware of who’s taking your photos.”

He pointed the camera screen in my direction and flicked through five photos. They were all of me; two from just now and the other three from earlier. The last one even had Alex in the background. The photos have a light and feathery feel to them, almost as if they’d been taken out of some dream. 

  “I-I, um…why exactly did you take photos of me?”

He smiled and took the camera back.

  “Because I had my camera and you happened to be around. I’ve been in the park for hours, most of my days are spent taking photos of people who don’t even know they’re being photographed.”