Delicate

SIX

A month. It's been a fucking month since I last saw Atlas. And three weeks since I last talked to him. Kasalukuyan akong nakaupo sa back stage at inaayusan para sa isang performance. My cousins are all outside except for my brother and Tokyo.

Kuya pushed back his fligh til tomorrow and Tokyo is in London to study. Must admit, life is pretty boring right now.

"Girl! Good luck! Hintayin ka namin sa labas." Rana said as she kissed my forehead. I smiled as she hopped her way out of my dressing room.

Backstage, I was standing nervous. When will I ever get used to this? Applause started to roar and that was finally my cue to enter the stage. Swan Lake started to play as I did my part.

Hinanap ng mata ko ang mga pinsan ko at si Atlas. I saw my cousin, but not him. Disappointed? Indeed.

Muli at umikot ang mata ko, katabi ng guests ang isang babae na mahaba ang buhok. Itim na itim at unat na unat. She was talking to Marilyn Winterheigen, one of the most promising ballerina.

With one last tip-toe, I finished the dance. Tumayo ang mga tao para magpalakpakan habang pumipito pa ang ilan sa aking mga minsan. Mga gago.

Iniyuko ko ang aking ulo at bumalik sa backstage para muli ay magpalit ng normal na damit. Matapos nito, lumabas ako papunta sa aking mga pinsan. It feels so empty without Kuya and Tokyo. And Atlas. Sinalubong ako ng yakap ni Rana.

I went home after the perfomance, pagod. I sighed as I lied in bed and stare at the painted ceiling of my room. It was a girl, dancing in the stars. It was me.

When I was younger, I was always in love with stars and they were quite a subject in my works. I loved painting the night sky. I always loved to wonder what it hides underneath. What's there beyond the galaxy? I'll spend my lifetime wondering.

Another week has passed and still no word from Atlas. Here I am on a bus ride with several kids from Tokyo's foundation. She asked me to accompany them to a tour which she was supposed to be at pero London got her busy.

Sa gitna ng tinatakbo ng isip ko, huminto ang bus. Kumunot ang aking noo at agad nagtungo sa driver.

"Mang Ben may problema po?" Tanong ko dito. Tumango ito at kumamot ng batok.

"Pasensya na po, Ma'am Manila. May problema po yata ang makina. Sisilipin ko po." Sabi nito at bumaba.

"Ate Manila, may problema po ba?" Lumapit sa akin si Bea at hinawakan ang aking kamay. Umupo ako upang magpantay ang aming paningin at ngumiti sa kaniya.

"Wala naman, Bea. Maaayos yan ni Mang Ben." Pag aalo ko dito. Tumango ito at muling bumalik sa upuan.

"Ma'am, umusok po ang makina. Kailangan po natin tumawag ng mekaniko." Sabi sa akin ng kababalik na si Mang Ben. Napabuntong hininga ako at sinubukan tumawag ng kahit na sino sa opisina ngunit walang sumasagot dahil Linggo ngayon.

I tried to call any of my cousins as well ngunit wala sa kanila ang sumagot. I tried again and Rana finally answered.

"Girl! Nasaan ka?" She asked.

"Eto, stuck sa gitna ng highway. Boundary ng Sta. Lucia and Sta. Arcadia Rana can you find a mechanic and send him here?" Sagot ko dito.

"I don't think a mechanic would be necessary. Help is on the way. Running on his white SUV. Enjoy the show! Ta ta!" She said and dropped the call.

White SUV? Kuya Amster? Si Kuya Amsterdam lang ang may puting SUV sa amin bukod kay Kuya Zagreb. Kuya Zagreb is currently in Cebu fucking-- I mean fixing his wedding, so it's impossible to be him.

Around an hour had passed when a White Chevrolet Trailblazer stopped in front of our bus. Wait. Trailblazer? Kuya Amster's SUV is Fortuner. Confused, I went down the bus.

Bumaba ang nagmamaneho ng sasakyan. Still on his white flight uniform. I was surprised. It was Atlas! He removed his aviators to look and smile at me. He jogged to my way and looked at my eyes.

"Damn it, angel. I waited almost two months to see you and here you are in the middle of the road." He said and chuckled.

"Kailan ka dumating?" I asked, still in daze. He tucked my hair on my ear.

"Ngayon lang. I went straight to your unit but you were nowhere to be found. Then on my way down, I crossed path with your cousin and I heard the conversation." He said and smiled.

Few minutes, and another bus came. The kids was transfered there. He sent Mang Ben home and had the bus towed back to the city.

Atlas somehow pursuaded me to ride his car instead of the bus. The whole ride was quiet. I was on my earphone at ayaw siya kausapin. Sa totoo lang, nagtatampo ako. At gusto ko kastiguhin ang sarili ko dahil alam ko, wala akong karapatang magtampo. Putangina ko nalang talaga.

"You're quiet." He acknowledged as the trip is still on going. Hindi ko siya pinansin, instead, I focused on my phone and scrolled my instagram timeline. A notification popped and I have to check it.

atlaszyair is now following you

Napakunot ang noo ko at nilingon siya. He was holding his phone as he drives!

"What the fuck, Atlas! That's dangerous!" I exclaimed as I grabbed his phone away from him. He chuckled and looked at me briefly.

"It takes me breaking the rules before you talk to me huh?" He said. I ignored him and closed my eyes instead, pretending to sleep.

As we reached the Enchanted Kingdom, agad kong binuksan ang pintuan ng sasakyan niya trying to get away as soon as I can but he got me cornered.

My back was against the trunk of his SUV as both of his arms are on the sides of my head. He was observing me as I look away from him.

"What are you angry about, angel?" He asked. I stiffened. The way his little pet name sounds makes the butterfly on my stomach throw their own party.

"You have to tell me what's wrong so we can talk about it." He gently whispered. His voice was low and husky. And damn, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't sexy.

"Almost two months ka wala, no communication and you arrive as if nothing happened? Stop playing with me, Atlas. I'm not your playmate." I said as I pushed his arms away. I successfully got out of his arms but he pulled me back and held me tight. I heard him laugh a little as he stroke my head.

"My baby is angry." He said as his firm arms are still around me. He pulled away but kept his hands on my arms.

"I had to fly straight and the only time I have spare is when I sleep, baby. I have to do overtime so I can take a long vacation. So I can see you again and stay with you longer." He explained and gently tucked my hair on my ear.

"Why?" I asked as my forehead formed a knot. He laughed and kissed my head.

"My angel is clueless, fuck it." He said and once again laughed. What have I said that is so funny?

"Before Zagreb left, he set some rules. One, I should never make you a playdate. And two, I should never take you to bed." He whispered as he looked into my eye.

"And here I am, calling you baby. What's it about you, baby? When you're around, you make me wanna break all the rules." He continued as he looks at me still.

He pulled me by my waist as he rest his chin on my shoulders, facing my ear. I can feel his breath on my shoulder and the monsters inside me are creating their own party.

"You should know it, Manila Alexandra. You are special to me." He whispered, leaving me shivering. He chuckled and planted a soft kiss on my shoulder before pulling me for a hug.

His strong arms are firm around me. As if I would run if he loosen his hold. His eyes were expressive and he was very fragile. Like I could break him if I wanted to.

"Tangina, I never really had someone that I wanted to please so bad. Making me fuck my schedule just to be with her." He whispered and chuckled. I couldn't breathe properly. And it wasn't because of his hold. There was something about him, about us that just drives me wild whenever it gets a chance.