Before I Met You

Chapter 4

"Gigi told me that there are some new people in town." My grandmother began as we ate dinner in mostly silence as I struggled to ignore her thoughts. "She stopped by yesterday to tell me the same." I replied uninterested.

Does every conversation need to include the new tourists? I just wanted to have one day where I didn't run into either of them or think about the tall, dark and handsome one who made me feel like a damsel in distress, pulling his friend away from me.

"I can't even remember the last time we got visitors. Let alone ones who decided to move in." She smiled wide as I poked at my food with a fork. "We should bring something over for them. A basket of baked goods perhaps?" She suggested instantly making me snap my head up to her.

"What? No. That's not necessary, Grandma." I pressed anxiously. "And why not? They've moved into a whole new town and don't know anyone yet. The last thing we want is for them to be intimidated and leave." She replied.

I doubt those men are intimidated by anything let alone a few dozens of prying eyes and murmuring neighbors. But a girl can dream.

"I've already had the honor of meeting two of them and I wasn't impressed. They don't strike me as the type of people to appreciate your kindness in baking for them." I expressed standing up with my empty plate to begin cleaning up.

"Does she always have to be so negative? How did she ever get this way? Did I really do that poor of a job raising her? Where did I go wrong with her? I hope one day somehow her heart softens and learns to be less angry about life." My grandmother thought to herself.

My chest ached as I stopped washing my dishes. Closing my eyes for a moment trying to keep myself together in front of her. I couldn't risk my tears revealing how much her words affected me. Even if she had no idea I could hear them.

"Everyone deserves kindness, Juliette. Even if they don't appreciate it."

A part of me felt guilty for using the bookstore as an excuse to avoid my grandmother but I just couldn't be around her and her thoughts filled with disappointment of me. I knew her reasons were valid and I could've tried harder to be a better granddaughter for her than I had been lately.

I desperately wanted to be everything I possibly could be for those around me: the doting granddaughter, the outgoing and happy go-lucky friend to others, and maybe even joking extracurriculars in high school. Instead of being the strange girl who kept to herself, avoiding everyone around her.

The girl who sulked in corners and tried everything in her power to stay invisible. But somehow I had failed miserably and became the laughing stock of my hometown all throughout school. I had hoped once we all graduated and moved on with our lives people would've forgotten about me.

The weird teenager who always seemed to speak what was on people's minds. The girl who somehow knew everyone's secrets and who somehow knew their true feelings and motives. But without luck.

Waking up in another cold sweat having the same occurring dream. The wind whistled making me almost jump out of my skin hearing tree branches scrape against my window.

Staring up at my ceiling as the hours passed and the sun eventually began to rise in the distance. Getting up and throwing on a pair of leggings and hoodie to go for a much needed run. I decided against wearing my headphones to listen to music, wanting to think and clear my mind.

Leaving a note on the fridge before leaving the warm house, running down the steps. Following the same path I always took into town and around the square.

Memories of my frightening dream flashed through my mind as my heart pounded rhythmically against my chest. Jogging at a steady pace as I avoided ice and snow banks on the sidewalks.