Horrors of the Mind

Xenomelia (RATED T: LANGUAGE, BLOOD, GORE, SELF HARM)

You had been diagnosed with xenomelia when you were around 7 years old. It had always been the least severe case that the doctors had ever seen, but it was still there. The worst it had ever been was wondering how your life would be different without your left leg, until one morning in early November...

You woke up one day with a weird feeling. You dismissed it as tiredness and got up to eat breakfast, but when you stood up your left leg felt weird. It felt like it was longer than your right leg, and it felt like it was about to fall asleep. You ignored it and went to the kitchen and made some cereal. As you ate, you noticed that your left leg continued to feel weird and decided to see your doctor about it. 

When you got to to the doctors office and explained what happened, he said "That's normal for people with xenomelia." "Is there anything you can do?" you asked him hopefully. "Sorry, I can't help you" he replied apologetically. "It's fine" you said, and left to to go to work. Could be worse you thought, and it made you feel a little better.

---TIME SKIP---

The next day when you woke up, your leg felt worse than the day before. It was slightly numb and it felt way longer than it should be, and you groaned. It seriously got worse?! you thought sadly, and got up to eat breakfast. When you got in there, you saw that your mom was there and she had made pancakes. "Mom, when did you here?!" you exclaimed, to which she replied "I got here this morning, I heard what happened and decided to come here in case it got worse." "Well I'm fine mom, there's no reason for you to be here." you lied, wanting her gone as soon as possible. "Alright, but I still want to spend some time with you today, I can drive home tonight. Now come eat some breakfast." she ordered, and you sat down. She made you a plate and sat it in front of you, and you started eating.

You hung out with her for the rest of the day, and your leg didn't get any worse, but it didn't get any better either. When you got home, your mom said "I should be heading home now, I'll see you at the Halloween party" "Alright, bye mom." you replied. After she left, you collapsed onto the couch and groaned. You turned on your favorite TV show, and eventually you fell asleep.

---TIME SKIP---

When you woke up the next day, you wanted to scream. You felt an extreme pins and needles sensation in your leg, and it was a little painful. You then realized that you were on the couch and groaned, as that meant you most likely missed your alarm and were late for work. You decided to call in since your leg hurt, and you had a medical reason.

You stayed on the couch for the entire day, and the pins and needles in your leg started feeling worse. At first it was bearable, but it continued to get worse until you wanted to cut your leg off. You eventually decided that it would feel better in the morning, so you took some melatonin gummies and fell asleep after a few hours.

---TIME SKIP---

You woke up and most of your leg felt fine, but there was one spot at about mid-thigh that still had the annoying pins and needles feeling. It would be fine if it was a circular spot on the outside, but it went all around the leg, and you didn't even know that it was possible to feel pins and needles in your bones. The disk was about two centimeters thick, and it felt so wrong. The leg beneath the spot felt like it was extra and unnecessary, and you hated it. You had to deal with this shit for the past 3 days, and you wouldn't take it anymore.

You called your doctor and the second he said hello you said "I need you to cut off my leg." There was silence for a moment before he said "I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to do that without a valid medical reason." You laughed and said "A- a valid medical reason?! My leg feels like it's on FIRE, and I can't fucking deal with it!" "I'm sorry but there's nothing wrong with your-" You cut him off by saying "If you don't do it I will!" You really didn't want this stupid leg that wasn't even yours to cause you any more trouble, why couldn't he see that?

"I'm sorry but I'm not allowed to-" You hung up. You tied some fabric around your leg to cut off the circulation, and ran down the stairs. You took a big kitchen knife off the counter and started to cut. You couldn't even feel the pain- you were too mad to feel anything at that moment. It took a while to get through the bone, but when it finally did you felt happy. You finally didn't have to deal with that stupid thing anymore.

You put your stump in some ice to make it clot, and threw the severed leg into the trash and laughed. You didn't know why, you were just so happy that the leg was gone. You texted the doctor that the leg was gone, but then your vision started to go dark. You smiled and thought at least that leg is gone.

---TIME SKIP---POV SWITCH TO DOCTOR---

"Estimated time of death: 11:15 A.M. Died of blood loss." said Mark, my coworker. "How the fuck was he smiling through that though?" I asked, and Mark said "I have no clue."