Willful Ignorance (hg fanfic)

The stories I keep

Spectra' pov
A trail of dust falls from the cover of the old book, across the back of my anxious hands, and onto the old creaking floor of the Justice Building's basement. No light finds its way through any cracks or crevices and the room is dark minus my flickering candle. I blow a bit more dust off of the book's old cover coughing as it blows into the air and my lungs. Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare, I barely make out before greedily opening the crackling pages.

As my eyes ravenously read the old words a blanket of light suddenly bursts its way through the entirety of the room and I squint from the sudden change. The silhouette of the old man falls like a shadow against the basement's worn out floors.

"Specktra are you down here?" he calls urgently and that is soon followed by loud thumping steps down the stairs. Quickly, I reach over to the hard stone, finding the loose one. My hands stumble while pulling it out, and after placing it on the floor, I slide the book into the hollow gap along with my Dickens and Poes before fully placing the stone back into place. "Specktra," Aulus shouts once more and finally, this time I respond.

"I'm here, Aulus." I listen to his pounding footsteps before his old, wiry face appears.

"Spectra," He says in agitation as a frown appears upon his face making his wrinkles become more prominent.

"Speck," I state, "I want to be called Speck. I hate Specktra."
"Specktra Satis," he continues ignoring my plea to never be called that horrendous name. "I've told you a thousand times that when there are this many peacekeepers here in District 3, we do not spend time focusing on leisurely activities. There are things to do." Even down here, where much has been forgotten, he doesn't dare whisper the word books. His grey eyes look at me with the same assurance as clogs on a machine confidently doing their jobs. He will never tell anyone about my reading.
After mumbling an apology, I scramble up onto my feet a layer of dust clinging to my clothes. A smile stretches onto Aulus's face but he remains quiet- not commenting on my disheveled appearance. "Come on Specktra. Go back to your Aunt's and clean up. She is probably worried sick about you. Especially on a day like today." I bite back telling him that she isn't worried about me and instead give him a small smile before making my way to the splintering steps.
"Specktra," he calls as I reach the doorway.
Turning around, I reply, "Yes?"
I can barely make out his face from the darkness of the basement, but I can faintly see his wise face looking at me with a small smile. "Who was it today?" he asks.
"Shakespeare," I respond. If anyone was listening, they would think that I'm talking about someone I had met.
"How was it?"
"Wonderful," and with that I exit the basement, heading out of the Justice Building, and into the Town Square. No one but Aulus and I know about the books. He first showed them to me when I had just started living with Aunt May. My mother had died from complications during child birth and for a long time it was me and my father. But when I was thirteen there was an accident with one of his projects that he was working on and the place caught on fire. Aunt May took me in because she hurt one of her legs and couldn't work. To her, I am a way to make money. Aulus was in charge of sorting papers at the Justice Building and he allowed me to take up a job assisting him. One day, he told me to stop working, head down to the basement with him, and there, he showed me his library.
"Come here," he says staring at me with his ancient eyes.
"What is it," I reply nervously. At nine years old I had seen many things- mostly horrible images that are engraved forever in my mind. So being down here in the basement made me nervous.
Aulus walks over to a wall. He searches for a moment before finding the spot he was looking for, and presses on a button before reveling a room. My young eyes widen in excitement. Old bound books sit in stacks upon stacks going on for miles. In District 3, we are only ever given the luxury of textbooks about technology. Nothing else. The Capital doesn't need whimsical thoughts influencing our minds.
"Wow," I whisper moving forwards. Entering the room, my hands trace the leather and covers of each of the books. "Where did you get all this?" Aulus motions me to a corner where a chair rests against the wall. I follow him now with an excited buzz, my interest growing like the steady ticking of a pocket watch.
Aulus sits down in the chair motioning me to take a seat on the floor. "In the Dark Days," he begins and I open my mouth to interrupt that I already know all about the Dark Days. However, he holds up his hand reminding me to be patient. "In the Dark Days," he repeats himself, "The people of District 3 were worried that all these stories would be destroyed; That these books, these things that elude time itself, would no longer be. My Great-grandfather was in charge of creating the room that would hold humanity. Since then, he passed it down to my Grandfather, and then he, my father, and my father to me. I have no children," he announces as I listen in excitement to his tale, "So I pass this knowledge down to you." Aulus grandly gestures to the hundreds of books around him.
"To me?" I respond in shock. Never before had I been given something so big. Heck! If this was food then I could feed all of District 3 for months.
Aulus laughs before leaning in closer, "Yes this is your secret to be kept now. But you must remember one thing..." I shake my head eagerly waiting for him to continue. "A story only ends when there is no one left tell it. It lives inside us, brings us together, makes us hope. The Capital fears the idea of us knowing, thinking, being; that is what makes District 3 different than all the rest. We don't mine for coal, or cut trees, or make weapons... our entire existence rests upon our imagination. Remember that."
I snap out my daydream my eyes watching the commotion in the square. Aulus's words give me comfort on a day like today. After all, they're not words that one forgets that easily. A month or so later after learning about the books, I was forced to switch jobs and work in the labs, but every afternoon, Aulus would let me go down and read. It was our secret; one I would keep forever.
The Town Square is busy this afternoon. Of course it is. Today is the Reaping. Peacekeepers scurry about yelling orders at people as stages and ropes are set up. I quicken my pace before one of them spot me. "Speck!" I stop walking at the sound of my name only to spot Rayce running up to me with something bundled in his arms. Rayce's parents are in charge of overlooking the lab that I work in. Rayce too, is my assigned partner. We make a good team... except when we try to outsmart the other... sometimes you need friendly competition.
"Hey, Ray," I respond as he catches up to me.
"Hey," he answers back, "My mom wanted me to give this to you. It's a little silly but she's giving it to everyone for good luck. We all need it today." He unwinds the cloth and reveals a mechanical flower made of loose metal parts. "It goes into your hair," he informs.
I look at the flower and the intricate way it connects to each part. Never had I seen something so cold and stiff look so beautiful and alive. "I love it," I whisper, "How do I put it on?"
"Here let me help." Ray takes my black hair pulling it through a loop in the flower. Stepping back while nodding his head, he responds. "It looks good on you."
"Thank you," I say reaching up to feel the flower in my hair as my cheeks redden slightly. I'm not accustomed to hearing pleasant comments about my appearance. "How many times is your name in there today?" I blurt out unable to help myself. Ray's face darkens shooting an angry glance towards the commotion in the Square.
"About fifty," he responds, "I refuse to let my brothers take out any tesserae." Rayce has five brothers all younger than him and all starving like the rest of us. With his parents working double in the labs and on the field, he's become a parental figure. "You?" he asks after a moment.
I shrug my shoulders, "About thirty; I've stopped caring. Aunt May forces me to take out tesserae every year. It's too worthless to do the math. I'd rather not know."
"Ignorance is bliss," Ray responds and I crack a small smile.
"The Capitol sure enjoys it." He laughs at my small insult and I join in after a moment. "What is it that Lace Carol always says?" I ask talking about the annoying escort lady from the capital who announces which boy and girl will be participating in the annual Hunger Games.
Ray flicks is overgrown hair out of his eyes before responding with a chuckle, "May the odds be ever in your favor." His voice picks up the sickly sweet accent of the Capitol. I shake my head at their stupid saying.
"If only they knew that the odds are never in our favor and only theirs. Perhaps then they would stop saying such foolish things. See you at the Reaping Rayce." I tell him and he says his goodbyes before heading back off again.
Aunt May is sitting at my homemade wooden workstation, when I walk through the door of our one story abode. Her fingers absentmindedly play with the spare parts sitting on my desk and her old face is as cold as a machine itself. She grunts when I come in motioning towards the bath that she set up for me. After scrubbing all the dirt and dust off of my skin, I pull on my finest outfit while keeping my hair up in the ponytail that Ray had made for me. Looking in the mirror I take in my appearance. My electric blue eyes are a rarity in District 3 most have green like Rayce or grey like Aulus. My lips are too thin for my liking and my body is small from not having enough food- it's strong from lifting all the machinery but small. As I rescrub my face, dust still clinging to it, our little homemade clock chimes above my head reminding me to hurry up. Time to go, I think to myself.
"Aunt May, I'm going," I supply and she mumbles a goodbye barely paying attention to me. Back at the square, I'm hustled into a line of girls and sectioned off into the seventeen year old unit. A platform now sits at the front of the Justice Building. Three chairs filled with Mayor Wirey, Lace Carol, and Dem Longwood- the Victor of the 54th Hunger Games- rest upon the stage along with two large bowls that hold our fate.
Suddenly I feel a tap on my shoulder followed by a voice, "Hello, Speck." I turn to my left to see Magna Wesley. She went to school with me when I was younger. We never talked much then so I'm surprised she'd approach me now. Perhaps she just wanted to be around a familiar face; I don't blame her. I supply a small smile not feeling like talking very much. "Nervous," she whispers and I nod my head. "Me too. More so for Fuse." Fuse is the nickname of her brother Jem. That boy can rewire close to anything and has a short temper too. "Look at what Lace Carol is wearing," she says pointing towards the stage. I stare at the outfit decorated with random gear or too here and there.
"I will never understand that," I announce to her and she nods her head, no longer having anything else to talk about. At the same time Lace Carol steps up to the podium, her spiked brown tipped hair looking close to poking the Mayor's eye out.
She clears her throat slightly, as her painted lips form a small smile, "Ladies and Gentlemen welcome, welcome to the 61st annual Hunger Games. And remember May the odds be ever in your favor." She plays a video and I tune out its words. My heart begins to hammer in my chest as the clip continues to talk about the Dark Days and how the Capital persevered against the District Rebels.
"Ladies first," Lace's voice sounds as the video comes to an end. She slowly walks to the bowl, her slender fingers carefully reaching in. I watch in dreadful agony as the paper unfolds. Please be Magna or someone else. The thought rudely falls through my mind and I scold myself for thinking such a thing. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.
"And the girl tribute is..." Lace pauses keeping us all on edge before slowly opening the paper, "Specktra Satis." My world is a blur. Nothing that I could have read would have prepared me for this. Now knowledge that I could ever obtain could make this moment any more bearable. My feet move of their own accord. I don't even realize that I've made it to the stage until I've shaken the mayor's hand and reached Lace, her horrible dress and all. "Congratulations," she responds motioning me to stand next to her. I want to shout. Scream. Tell her that I don't feel lucky at all. I don't this fate. Does Aunt May care? I try to find her in the sea but instead I find Aulus. His eyebrows are knitted in despair, and his face is pinched. A story only ends when there is no one left to tell it, I remind myself and there are still people who tell yours. You may be about to be sent to your death but you're not gone yet.
I don't even realize that Lace has moved on to pick the unlucky boy. I don't even have time to wish for Rayce to be safe before she calls it out. It's not Rayce. Its Magna's brother. I hear a strangled cry come from the girls as Magna tries to make her way towards him. Peacekeepers pull her back and Fuse steps onto the platform. His hand shakes mine as instructed by Lace and I stare him straight on. In the back of my mind I hear Race saying that stupid sentence; May the odds be ever in your favor. As Lace begins to escort us off the stage I scoff at myself. Clearly the odds are not on my side. As I enter the Justice Building- another stop on the path to my death- a pitiful thought enters my mind, who will I tell about the books?

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Authors note:
Hey guys!! So I decided that while I'm busy editing Misfits I'd go ahead and write a Hunger Games fanfic. Yay! Anyways, I have to do this because blah, blah, blah! The books the hunger games do not belong to me in anyway (that would be so sweet if they did). The concept of Panem is Suzanne Collins but the characters and plot of this story is MINE!!!! (Felt like being dramatic there). Anyways, can you guys believe that it is 2015... It still feels like 2005 ;) hope you all had a great holiday. I got a pretty sweet cup that said "it's ok. Writers should be strange." I think my family was trying to tell me something... :) stay amazing!