one of these days when
someone asks
oh what
what is the matter with you
i swear to god
i will answer
in full.
there is a stain on the jeans i bought two days ago and i simply cannot combat it right now.
i let my sister cook eggs for lunch and she put in at least three twists of pepper,
pepper and eggs is a hideous combination to me and i
i cannot find the cheese grater in this
crowded hellish mess of a grey kitchen,
though there is not a square of sharp cheddar to grate upon it either way.
christmas ended too soon and now i've no time left at all
to play with my new toys, my tablet, my sleek and lovely
present, no time to wear my new gloves about and snap aimless, brilliant
pictures with my camera. no time to even begin to fill
in several different sizes of sketchbook.
and i even have homework i never finished.
i don't want to do that at all.
the new year is terrifying to me. the boy i love kissed another girl at midnight on january first.
i am almost out of cranberry juice.
and gum.
i still get embarrased about things that happened years ago- and
ever since i stepped over the stone cobbles of my elementary school, heading
for the little bright bus on the last day of sixth grade, i have nursed
a coal, a sad small ember with
occasional flare-ups of montrous proportions-
what will i do when it's over?
that's what the matter is, darling,
that's what you ask when you say
what's the matter.
