Underwater (jeanmarco college au)

chapter 6- you were always right

Monday came by in a rush. I woke up unaware of just how sleep deprived I was.

"What the hell?" I muttered. Eren was already up playing on his DS. I could here the sounds of fighting and punching coming from his device.

"Oh, good morning." He said unable to take his eyes of his screen.

"Eren, turn that down." I commanded. He completely ignored me. I yelled the phrase again receiving an answer.

"Shut up mom!" Eren yelled across the room.

I threw a pillow at his face. "Dude, both our moms are dead." I think the only reason Eren and I haven't killed each other was because we deep down inside felt sympathy and pity for one another. I got up, however it wasn't how I planned. My legs still felt like lead and that caused me to roll off my bed, landing with my face straight down.

"Fucking ow." I said over Eren's laughter.

"Haha, Jean, did you get fucked or something." Im surprised he managed to speak behind his own laughter.

"Shut up, Jaeger. I swear to god I'll find the strength to move and kick your ass." I spit as I attempted to get up. my legs were wobbly and it was hard to keep my balance.

"Jaeger! What time is it?" I asked holding onto my desk trying not to do any damage to myself with my unstable legs.

He turned to his watch,"It's 6:45." My face froze and I could no longer feel the pain in my legs. I ran across the room trying to get dressed.

"Oh wait, you have class with freckles right now right?" Eren asked.

"How the hell do you know Marco?"

He rolled his eyes, "He's Armin's roommate and he told me he offered you a job." He stretched out in his bed,"Don't screw him up so badly, ok Jean?"

I threw on my backpack and aimed for the door,"Fuck you, I don't have time for this." With that I was off. I had like ten minutes to get to class but I didn't want to look like an idiot running around campus.

Is your social anxiety kicking in again?

I'd most defiantly rather be late than have people notice me. I would do anything it took to push people away. It sounded kind of harsh but I've always lived like this. I could hardly remember my old self. I walked to class, kicking rocks that got in my way. It was cold. I put my hands inside me hoodie's pocket. I took this time to look around. All the cherry blossom trees around campus had already bloomed and were turning weak due to the freezing winter. I pointed out a lot of differences in my world but it all stopped when I got to class.

"Ah, Mr.kirchstein. You're late. Please take a seat." All eyes turned to me. I looked away with a terrible blush on my face. I walked to my seat and time seemed to stop as more people looked at me.

I defiantly should have ran.

The class didn't start again until I sat down.

"Ah yes, back to our main topic...." The teacher's comments seemed to fade away one by one as Marco turned around to wave at me. He smiled at me as if he were waiting for my arrival just to do that. At least that's what I wanted to think. Hours ticked by. I began to realized how hard it must be to handle work and classes. Marco had to put up with twice the stress as me and yet he never should a sign of regret or remorse. I wanted to be like that. To be so optimistic to block out the stressful moments. I couldn't possibly do what he was doing. As a junior trainer, you're required to preform a show at least ten times a month. I couldn't possibly do that with my social anxiety.
Mom used to repeat the same thing to me when I felt like this.