Abysmal Wattpad Advice ["Advice" and Rants]

200+ Stories/Commitment [Lesson 1]

So you're a writer, huh?

You want to write another story when you already have one to write? That's fine.

Balancing your time between two stories isn't too hard, and if they're distinct enough we won't have to worry about their different ideas meshing too much.

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Oh.

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Let me teach you beautiful people how to become the God of Wattpad fanfiction!

Step 1: Write a Story!

Step 2: Lose Interest in that Story!

Step 3: ???

Step 4: Profit!

These are the holy teaching that will bring you to the promised land! If you dare to go against these, you clearly don't have enough drive in order to be a writer!

Huh? Some people enjoy those stories you've forgotten about?

Well, whenever they ask for updates tell them that if they ask you about updates you'll postpone the update, because you were absolutely going to write it anyways!

You see, the thing is... having more stories brings you more followers. If you get 10 followers for each new story you make and you have 200 stories guess what, you have over 2000 followers!

Congrats! You're a god-like writer based on one number!

What? There are good writers who only have a few stories that all have a higher quality?

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Uh, let's move on.

So now you, a god of Wattpad, have these tons of stories but you don't know which one to update?

Well, you could always trim down the amo—

Sorry, my common sense came rushing back. What I meant to say is that you shouldn't update any of them!

Wanna know what you should do?

Use every idea that comes into your head, don't worry, I promise it's gonna get you very far!

Okay, now that I know you'll be known as a god among writers, let me teach you the next step.

Being committed to writing.

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Wow, y'all are so scared of commitment it's no wonder your relationships never work out.

Okay okay, my point here is simple.

In order to grow, maybe you should grow a fanbase that has some sort of normalcy of when you're gonna update your stories.

How do you do that with 237 stories? Well, who's problem is that?

Ah, it's mine... I did teach you that.

SHHHHHH, that's not important!

Why do you think so many people like YouTube, or anime, or TV shows? Obviously besides whatever their content it's because of one thing.

Consistency.

It'll make or break your time while writing.

But I don't know anything! This is just here to allow others to become gods of writing, but me, well I'm just a peasant in the eyes of you all.

After all, saying that you write just for fun is the easiest way out of any commitment to writing.

It's like having friends. If you only are there for them when it's fun... are you truly even a good friend?

I'm just a weirdo here to give the holy teachings, I don't know how friendship works!

You'll be perfectly fine as long as you update every four years!

Whenever you can't update every four years just blame it ton school, your job, or family!

Thank you for listening to the holy texts of writing, with them, you too will become a god of writing!

On a more real note, thinking before you write is important. It may be fun to watch a movie then get an idea and write the first three chapters all in one go, but after the excitement what do you have left?

A story that'll never get finished.

And with the commitment thing, I understand that life gets in the way, but I truly believe if you care about something enough, you'll make time.

Maybe that means getting up earlier to write, or writing a little bit before bed every single day, but I do believe it's possible.

When I'm not on a break I try and update my main story once every weekend. I understand that's not possible for a lot of people but... Writing means enough for me a lot, so it's worth losing some sleep or video game time over.

Whether writing is just a meh hobby or your life dream, I hope to meet you again in the next lesson!

I totally stole this idea from @PitaNemuritoare.
I hope you're chill enough to not mind this!