SPIRIT!

Maintaining

"Son, wake up before you over sleep. You have slept through three alarms. Time to get up. The flight will be leaving in less than an hour", my father said . Marcos funeral would be held in Compton where he was born and raised so Niecy and I would be flying there.

After Marco's passing I took a few days away from school and went to home to be around my parents. I have not went back to my dorm room yet. I feel like it will be too painful to walk in and not see Marco there. This will be my first day going outside since the tragedy that happened at the party. I have been laying around my bedroom and my parents have come in to check on me and give me food. I have not talked much. I have been in a daze. This all still does not seem real to me. How could I have let this happen? Why did we go to the after party? I then began to reason with myself. Coach Torey gave us this whole speech about not blaming ourselves and reassuring Niecy and I that we are young and we're just celebrating like anyone our age would do and that the accident is not our fault. I halfway believed her but at the same time I still wished I could have stopped him from getting on that motorcycle.

"May I come in?" My mother asked lightly knocking at my door that was already open. I shrugged my shoulders. "Olen I know you have not talked about this much with your father and I but we still want to remind you that we are here for you", she said placing her hand in top of mine. I wanted to say thank you but I didn't feel like talking much. I shook my head letting her know I acknowledged her. She sighed and walked out of the room. I sat on the bed for a few more seconds and then got the strength to get up.

I went to the shower and let the water run on me for a few minutes while thinking before I actually started to clean myself. I got out the shower and got dressed and looked in the mirror. I had not been sleeping much since Marcos death so I looked tired. I managed to get dressed and come out of my bedroom. My parents were waiting in the living room to drive me to the airport. I got a text from Niecy letting me know that she was outside of the house and would be riding with us as well. We all got in the car and drove to the airport.

The drive to the airport was silent. Niecy looked over at me and I could see the pain in her eyes. Her and I have not seen one another that much since the party. We both have been in our homes. I had been so tired that I instantly fell asleep on the flight. I ended up waking up right as we were landing.  We got in our Uber and headed toward our hotel. We did not say much to one another as we got dressed and waited for another Uber to drive us to the funeral. As we started to approach I noticed a lot of people were already outside walking in. We all got out the car and Niecy came over to grab a hold of my arm as we walked in.

We saw nearly cheer squad there. We all embraced one another and then sat next to each other in solidarity. We watched as his family spoke about him and I cried whenever one of his family members cried. It came time for his sister to speak and she was so torn up that she couldn't form any complete words. She stepped away crying. Marcos mother hugged her and held her tight as Marcos father got on the microphone. "Would anyone else like to speak about our beloved son, Marco?" He asked looking into the crowd. I looked around but everyone seemed to be so hurt. I do not know why but I raised my hand and stood up, "I will", I said. Niecy looked at me and slightly nodded her head in support of me. I walked down the aisle and reached Marcos father who put his hand on my shoulder.

"Ladies and gentlemen, please listen as Olen Williams, my sons roommate, squad member and good friend speaks to us."

I breathed hard, looked up at the sky and then began.

"I may have not known Marco as long as some of you all here in attendance today but I can say for the short time that I did, he brought a ray of light into my life. Since we met at cheer camp we had grown to be best friends even though he would never call me by my full name because he thought it was lame", I said making a great deal of the crowd laugh.