Reality Shmeality

Chapter Two

Dad moved out at sixteen, finding a much different world than the one he grew up in. His parents were immigrants from Hungary and came from a very conservative background. They were hard workers and did everything possible to provide for Dad, their only child and the reason they moved to Western New York in the first place. A few months after finding out that Grandma was pregnant, they were on a boat and headed to the land of opportunity. Grandpa learned enough English to find work as a plumber, and Grandma raised Dad while selling fruit on the corner of Joseph Avenue in downtown Rochester.

Located on Lake Ontario, and just east of Lake Erie, Rochester is infamous for its snowstorms and frigid temperatures. Grandma was never able to adjust to the Western New York winters and became depressed each year as the snow began to fall. So was born the tradition of driving to Florida in the wintertime where Grandpa had a cousin who found him work. The family of three stayed together in a single room, and Grandma helped out with chores around the house as a way to help earn their keep.

Moving every year made it hard for Dad to stay in school so he was homeschooled on a part-time basis. He never cared much for the classroom setting. He was more interested in hands-on activities. While helping out Grandpa, he learned plumbing and electrical at a very young age. They kept up the routine of Florida in the winter and Rochester during the rest of the year until Dad was fifteen. At that age, he gave up on schooling altogether. He wanted nothing more than to work full-time. The decision nearly killed my grandparents, but they were supportive of his choice once he found work, helping provide for the entire family. Dad connected with some local bands and became very involved with the music scene in Miami. Before too long, he had so many gigs that he started his own business.

Dad hired two of his friends to help out, and they were setting up and running concerts all over Miami, nearly every night of the week. My grandparents headed back to Rochester in March of 1967, and Dad stayed in Miami on his own at the age of 16. He rented a small apartment with his friends and continued plugging away with his music production outfit. After a couple of years, he got his first big gig with The Doors. He helped set up the lighting and sound for the 1969 concert in Coconut Grove that led to Jim Morrison's arrest for exposing himself on stage at the Dinner Key Auditorium.

Dad spent that afternoon setting up for the show and sharing drinks and stories with Jim Morrison himself. He kept in touch with Jim and the guys from The Doors over the next couple of years before Jim's untimely death in 1971. The relationship Dad had with Jim connected him with other musicians and managers, pretty much guaranteeing him work for the next decade. Dad traveled all over the world and had great relationships with some of the most respected musicians in the business. He was friendly with Bob, Jimi, Janis, Simon and Garfunkel, you name it. His stories used to be the glue that kept our neighborhood bonded together like a small community of friends and family. Some of his tales were so wild that many people thought he had fabricated an entire life out of thin air, but they were all true.

Dad took a break from life on the road in 1982 when Grandpa passed away due to complications from pneumonia. He headed back to Rochester for the funeral and stuck around to help Grandma. She was devastated and needed Dad there to help her through the trying times. He had always felt guilty for living such a vagabond lifestyle while they lived in Rochester without him, but he knew that they moved to the U.S hoping he would be able to find opportunities that weren't as attainable back in the countryside outside of Budapest. Dad moved back in with Grandma and helped her as much as he could. He didn't complain about taking a hiatus from the life of a roadie and never made her feel bad about his decision to move back home. He knew that he would never have the opportunity to be there for her if he didn't stick around for more than a few weeks. She was in the early stages of Alzheimer's, and the death of Grandpa sent her into a downward spiral.