proper meal (romantic rusame)

1.2K 19 13
                                    

Warning;
includes implied ameger, mentions of vomit, starvation, death, and includes whole lot of angst 👉😎👉 and obv rusame like read the title

this is @WhiteEcho2 's request expect mean bc i feel like hurting people.

america's pov

it hurts. it hurts so much. god, i might throw up- the man in front of me slammed his hands on the table. "you fucking used me!" i'm sorry i know it's bad but it's better than dying. don't say that. don't let people know you're weak. haven't you learned anything from the first time? "awe, is jerry angey?~" i purred, poison begging to be released from my mouth so i can explain to him how much he repulses me. "you used me for my money! why the fuck wouldn't i be angry!? let me guess, your whole fucking 'i'm poor and starving' schtick is all an act too?" no. not like you'd care, you were only interested in getting in my pants. fair is fair though, i was only interested in getting in your wallet. i turned away from him. i don't know what the right answer to that question is. "i can't believe i actually fell for your shit, america. good luck 'eating,' which i bet you'll have loads of problems with." he rolled his eyes. i will.

i want to claw out of my own body and puke my guts out. when's the last time i've eaten? it had to have been a day or two ago, but time is all jumbled up and i can't tell when is when and where is where. i want to- or you could stop moping and go over the cutie in the green coat. i glanced up more. just as i thought, a total cutie. the babe has probably never been downtown before. that coat looks expensive. i wonder if it's fluffy.. maybe he could put it around me.. some warmth would do me good.. my stomach egging me on, i skipped over to him. "heya, sweetheart. you don't look like you're from around here. new to the area?" he glanced me up and down. "just passing through." ooo, i like stoic ones! "it'd be better not to. it's scary down here, y'hear? most people tend to stay away." he looked like he was forcing himself not to look at me. "so, what's a pretty boy like you doing here downtown?" i asked, leaning my weight on one foot as a walked. "i could ask you the same thing." i grinned. "i live here." he seemed to give up on trying to escape me, so he slowed for us to talk more easily. "you work down here too?" he cocked an eyebrow. "sorta. depends on the day, if i get somethin' to work on at all...." i could practically sense his pity whelming up. feel bad for me until you can feel bad for being with me. "you look.. tired. and hungry." wait what. i glanced up at him. that's not how this is supposed to work. i- "i am. very." i blurted out. shit. what happened to no weaknesses, dumbass!? "which?" stop it. he's not supposed to know. "both, each extremely." he offered his arm to me. "i could buy you lunch? i'd feel bad knowing i left a starving man alone, especially one i'm acquainted with.." i smirked at him. "i wouldn't worry about that, pretty boy. pretty much everyone in the area is starving, and they'd much prefer you'd leave them alone. but i'll allow it this time, just cos' you're cute." he smiled, blush dusting his cheeks. bingo. "i never got your name, sweetheart." he gaze darted away, as if him telling me his name would change my opinion of him. "russia." i smirked. "pretty name for a pretty guy." i remarked, rubbing his arm. "what ab-" the amused smile seemed permanently etched on my lips. "it's america, honey."

russia's pov

"what do you do for work?" i asked, cleaning my chin just in case i got some sauce on it. he looked up from the food he was apparently very focused on. "hm? oh, i do whatever's available. i work part-time at a fast food place down a couple blocks down, but money's tight.." sympathy welled up in me. how'd someone like you end up living a life like this? "what about you?" wow. he really doesn't know, does he? that's fair, you can't expect someone using every penny on things they need to have enough left for being a drunk. "i own a liquor company. i didn't do much of the work, i inherited it from my father. i was down here for a meeting with a family member about it, actually, when i bumped into you." he perked up. i don't know why. "did i intrude on your meeting time?" oh. that's why. i chuckled. "i wish you could've, but no. i was looking for a taxi on my way back." america nodded slowly, putting some more food in his mouth. he finished chewing, before looking back at me. "you won't find taxis down here. most people don't have enough money, so they stopped trying a couple months back up. if you take a left from here and then go straight two blocks, you should find a more- er- finically stable place where taxis end up more often." wow. he really knows his way around. "you finished your food already?" i asked, tilting my head. he flushed, playing with his thumbs. "er- yea. it's been awhile since i've eaten such a.. proper meal. most the time i end up eating at checkers." i frowned. he did look rather skinny, now that i took a closer look. "would you like some cheesecake, then? something sweet for once." he pushed a strand of hair behind his ear and looked down shyly. "you would do that for someone you just met?" i took his hand. "i'd do it to help someone in need." america smiled.  it wasn't the smirk i had seen previously plastered onto his face, this was sweet, genuine smile. "thank you, russia. really."

"i met a guy." germany smirked at me. "oh, did you now? what's his name?" i glanced to the side. "america.." i mumbled. his smirk dropped. "no- ugh, goddamnit. not you too!" i looked up. "what do you mean, me too?" suddenly he looked sorry for me. "america's a hustler. him and i had a thing a while back, and i found out after a month or two of dating him that he was just using me for my money." he growled. "he played off the act of being starving and tired all the time, but i think that was phony too.." his voice trailed off. my heart practically shattered. using me..? but he looked so genuinely happy and.. no. you've known germany for years, he wouldn't lie to you about this thing. "so you'll 'break up' with him, right?" i want to say no. i want to say that he's starving in the streets and doesn't have enough money to eat a proper meal, but.. "of course." my gut instinct was screaming at me to say no, but i can't.

"fancy meeting you here, honey." my face hardened. don't mess this up. "get off." i pushed america off of my arm. he titled his head. "what's wrong, sweetheart?" he looks- no. thats not genuine concern thats not genuine concern thats not- "you were using me. i talked to germany." his face dropped into a scowl. "damnit. i knew jerry would come back to bite me eventually... that fucker.." i don't know why i'm so surprised to here him talk ill of someone. "what.. what do you mean?" he looked up at me was a bored expression. "jerry found out i was using him for food so he told all the rest of my 'clients' that i was faking weakness to guilt trip them." i... he's not even.. denying it? that's what hurt the most. he's not denying the fact that he was using me. "were you?" he put his hands in his pockets. "you tell me. sorry to waste your time, then. thank you for our meal and our talk, once again. it was fun."

america's pov

i was shivering, hugging my body. i have nothing to throw up anymore, make it stop.. pleading did me no good. i rolled over in pain and vomited. i started gasping for air. it's been three days since i've eaten or had any water. i can feel myself fading, i know this is it. at least i'll be warm in hell.

- - - -

ow???? my heart???? what the fuck??? anyway thank you for the request, it was an interesting one. i don't write angst very often in this book so this was a nice change of pace. a painful one, but a nice one.

i need to stop getting attached,
-aut

1396 words

cavities - a countryhumans one-shot bookWhere stories live. Discover now