Glorious Lilacest

Because Yes.

Lilacest

It was a warm, sunny afternoon. A young girl sat at her desk, contemplating in what way she could completely fuck everything up. She sat up suddenly, and made a move to snap her fingers, but our weak-ass author can't snap so she just wiggled her fingers like an idiot. She picked up a pencil from her gigantic pile of pencils holy fuck where do you even get that many and began to write.

Blue was at home, flopped on her couch, when it began. She was watching a random show that the author was too lazy to describe. Suddenly, because this totally happens all the time, she heard a knock at her door. She stayed sitting on the couch, that lazy mother fucker, waiting for whoever it was to leave, because getting up sucks. Whoever it was just kept on fucking knocking, though, so she finally stood up and went to open the door and-

Wait what.

What the ACTUAL fuck is the writer trying to do here.

Okay fine. Let's go ahead with the depraved shit.

Blue opened the door and saw someone who looked exactly like her, except every detail of Blue's that was blue, was red on this newcomer. Holy shit, Blue said. Wait what. Why did the author write it that way. You're supposed to use quotation marks shitlord.

"Holy shit," Blue said.

That's fucking better.

"Sup Blue," Said the random red doppelgänger. "My name's Red."

"No shit Sherlock," Blue said because really, as if we couldn't fucking guess that the red bitch would be named Red.

"Anyway, I've come for your ass," Red declared.

"It's about fucking time." Blue said.

Whoa. Hold the fuck up, author. You're supposed to put a fucking comma there, not a period.

"It's about fucking time." Blue said,

NOT THERE FUCKASS. THE OTHER ONE.

"It's about fucking time," Blue said,

NOW REPLACE THE OTHER COMMA WITH A PERIOD.

"It's about fucking time," Blue said.

THANK YOU HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

Red strutted her hot ass into the house and pulled Blue up to her bedroom, where they proceeded to have hot lesbian sex.

The end.

DEAR GOD THIS STORY WAS A FUCKING TRAIN WRECK. THANK FUCK IT'S OVER.

But then, Blue....

NOPE. THE END. I HOPE ALL YOU READERS ARE FUCKING HAPPY. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU TRUST THIS FUCKNUT OF AN AUTHOR.

THE

FUCKING

END.