The Modelo Virus (Movid-69)

1AM rant & a micro-penis

See, I used to have this book I wrote when I was in like what, 10th grade? I was 15.

It was basically an online diary. It was fun and a great outlet until one of my friend's cousin's found it, apparently. And it was also apparently my fault that said friend got in trouble for lying about her boyfriend.

Ah, high school. What a waste of time.

It wasn't that bad. I enjoyed majority of it.

Until the basically only friends I had started to exclude me from the group. It used to be all us four. Then it just turned into them three and myself eating in the corner.

Few things suck more than being excluded from something you helped create. To think I spent so much time, energy, and money on those clowns. I hope they read this someday.

BuT aReNt YoU tHe cLoWn FoR dWeLLiNg oN tHe PaSt LiKe ThAt

Nobody fucking asked you, Karen.

Let's give them all fake names. One is Betsy, the stuck up bitchy one. Grizelda, the undeniably fake and self-victimizing one, Griz for short. And Kelly. The one that was supposed to be my best friend.

Now, if they're all so terrible, how did they become my friends? Well Betsy and I always fought. ALWAYS. Ever since we met in 9th grade. But we would always end up hugging it out and getting over it. It got worse when she started dating this guy in our friend group. The guy that always would check me out when she wasn't looking. We all knew it, it was no secret.

Griz ended up getting tired of Betsy the bitch queen and would go to me and Kelly when she was upset with her. That lead to Griz and Kelly becoming closer friends and them forgiving Betsy eventually. Which of course lead to them all closing me off from the group, because of the grudge Betsy continually had against me.

They were all really bad with boys. Betsy dated a few, maybe three guys in our four years of high school. None for more than six months at a time. LMAO.

Grizelda even less, she only really had one real boyfriend. Who she actually left after we graduated, because he started asking for nudes. Not cute guys.

Kelly never dated anyone. She was really tall and nobody in our school was really her type, nor was she really their's. Its been almost four years since graduation and I can guarantee she still hasn't found someone.

Dating and having a boyfriend isn't really important. People often find happiness in themselves and friends, and are never lonely. I unfortunately are not one of those people. I need someone special to be with. I'm not close enough to any friends to have a similar bond. Stacy is quite close to that, but she irritates me too much for it to really be perfect.

Being the thot that I was in high school, I almost always had a boyfriend. Griz used to say, "Wow Emma got another one from her boy fridge!"

Despite almost always being taken, I was pretty conservative about it. I'm glad I didn't make any regrettable decisions. I mean, sometimes I wish I hadn't seen, lets give him a name... George? Yes, that works. I often wish I had never seen George's micropenis in the dark in front of the school library. I'm not even joking or trying to be mean, it was a micropenis.

There's nothing wrong with smaller dicks, as long as you know how to use it, you can be even better than those other frighteningly massive shlongs.

I also had a girlfriend at some point. It wasn't for long though, she asked me out at a terrible time. If she had done it a summer before, we probably would have lasted for a very long time.

I'm much more picky with women than I am boys. Notice how I didn't say girls 👁👅👁

Mostly because I'm a girl and I know how emotional we can get. When I had to meet Steven's family, I had a total of like three nervous breakdowns a few days before.

I usually connect with guys much easier than girls as well. So I usually lean towards them on the sexuality scale.

Don't get me wrong, women are beautiful. Goddesses. Their bodies are literal temples of which they should have the right to decorate in any way they please.

But I also like dick. So yeah.

Everything is actually a little crazy right now, because Stacy is actually BIG mad at me and Steven right now. She hasn't really talked to me all day, and she probably won't until I say something. Which I won't, because I'm too prideful for that.

Basically we had sex in my room after she gave me a whole speech about how uncomfortable it makes her feel. Me and Steven, not me and Stacy. Oh God no.

In my opinion, we're very considerate about it. We keep the bed creaks to a minimum, turn music on pretty loud, and we turn on the AC as well so it doesn't get all musty.

Obviously minimal bed creaks aren't no bed creaks, so I guess she heard it and it really pissed her off. I was tits down, ass up when she started banging on my locked door.

"You guys are gross!!" She yelled as she angrily stormed back into her room.

Her parents didn't want Steven to come inside the house as much anymore, because of the Modelo Virus. My poor baby still works 40+ hours a week, despite the risks. Luckily her parents actually weren't home at the time, so it was okay for him to be there.

Either Steven and I are just really that magnetic, or hormonal as hell because we always end up doing something when we're together. I don't mind, I enjoy it. If I didn't want to do it, I'd say so and he would respect that. As he should, ladies.

We were courteous enough to do it when her parents were gone, that's all I have to say.

It is now the next day and I still have received no real words from Stacy. Usually she'll just leave me alone until I say something, or until she decides to miss me. Quite honestly, I don't really care.

On another note, I think I might have a fairly slight addiction to buying enamel pins. Preferably ones off Kickstarter. The bad thing is, you don't know how much you're spending until the pins are actually done with production, and they charge you for it later. I mean you can always just check, but it's really easy to pledge much more than you expected.

My glorious pin board is almost full. I might take off my brother's pins from it to make room someday, depending on how many I end up collecting. I also might take off the cheap ones I've bought that served as fillers.

We're going camping soon, I hope yall are ready for that adventure.