It was the middle of the night. I had no idea it could go this wrong. Dean had been possessed, Castiel was who knows where and Sam had lost his mind in the search. We had been searching for a way to get Dean back for weeks now. Day in, day out we would be in the library going through anything we could find. The earliest possession in the books, which even dates back to years before Christ. Even Gabriel was helping, sending us the information he found. He better, after Sam had threatened him for hours to help us, but he couldn't find a thing.
I grew up with the Winchesters, although my uncle Bobby didn't like that very much. I was there to help stitch Dean up after his father had gone mad again, I was Sam's shoulder when his father send him away when he got into Stanford and they were my rocks when Bobby died. My uncle, the only family by blood I had left. I cried my way through the night, it was the moment I lost my hope and faith, but they were there. They did everything to keep me safe, which usually meant I was the one who stayed in the Bunker when they had a hunt. Sometimes they were gone for weeks and I would be going mad, making up scenarios, every one of them worse than the other, but they always came back. That's what made this time worse, what if he wasn't coming back? I couldn't imagine a life without Dean Winchester in it.
It was the night of July 24th when I turned 16 years old. Dean was 18 at the time. He took me out in the Impala to the drive-in cinema. He even let me decide on the music... probably because we have the same taste. I can't remember what I ate last night, but I remember everything about that night. I remember they were showing The Princess Bride, I remember Dean quoting the movie and calling it dumb. I remember the smell of old leather in the car and the smell of his divine cologne. I remember the moment after the movie, it was 1 o'clock and Dean and I were laying on the hood of the car, gazing up at the stars.
"Aren't they beautiful?" I had asked him.
"Mwah." he simply answered as I looked at him in confusion. "But I look at you every day, so when I see the stars they're just, mwah." he said before he smirked at me.
I remember the touch of his hand against my cheek, I remember the taste of his lips, I remember those green eyes looking at me and his freckles disappearing behind a light shade of blush. We had dated for a year, to the disapproving of our families, but we didn't need them.
Then Dean left on a hunt with his dad and he disappeared. It wasn't until Sam and Dean stumbled upon my uncle that I saw them back. I helped them to find their dad back, although he was a piece of shit, and things got back the way they used to be. 3 friends out on the road.
He doesn't know, but my feelings never changed. I dated others in the mean time and it took some time for me to realize who I actually wanted, but the way he talked about woman and his adventures with them... they made me want to be one of them. For one more time I wanted to be the woman who could wow him. That was my weakness.
Dean had always been my weakness, but I never thought I would be willing to go the lengths I go for him, a guy who doesn't even notice me.
"Sam, I think I found something." I said as I walked into the library where the cub of the clan was sitting.
"What is it Y/N/N?" he asked, looking up at me as I threw on old file I had found in front of him.
"Moose, this is it."
"First of all, hang out with Crowley less. Second, what did you find?"
"Dean, he has to be there. It's an old basement where druids used to go for power, there are five ley lines crossing so it's the ultimate portal to Hell. He probably uses it to recharge. I checked camera footage for night animals and a male is seen on it. It isn't clear, but he's wearing the same clothes. I'm telling you, it's him."
"Where is it?"
"I'll show-"
"No." he interrupted me. "You're not going, you've never even been on a hunt, it's to dangerous."
"I have to Sam, it's about Dean."
"It's about you too."
"I don't care. Sammy, I need him." I told him as tears were burning the beds of my eyes.
"I do too Y/N/N. I'll go and see if there's anything there, you stay here and sign me when you have something else. Go take a shower or something, you need to relax."
"I can't-"
"Yes you can. I know about your feelings for him mi hermana."
"Stop calling me that." I chuckled slightly.
"You are." he chuckled as well before pulling me into a hug. "I'll find Dean, I promise." he told me before leaving.
