Sith's Awakening - a Starwars story

EPISODE EIGHTEEN - apprentice finds their lodge

"I need you to tell me everything that happened."

Words didn't quite get through now. A filter sat between everyone in the room blocking off meaning as if it was nothing. Leia's words weren't any different in comparison, hitting Ben's invisible wall and bouncing right back. There was too much on his mind and was frankly sick of how his mother still scolded him to this day. He didn't let this show, though. Making it seem like he really was here when his mind distanced somewhere else.. but he did consider her vaguely.

Kydraa's name was bound to roll off his tongue in some way or another, so he backtracked. Was she even worth mentioning? If so, does he even use that name. It definitely didn't belong to the person he saw previously. She did, somewhat look like the Kydraa he knew. White hair, peachy skin, slim figure in dark robes. But then again, there wasn't much to parallel anymore. Just seperate beings with barely a feature in common. He even heard someone different talking to him, even if he wanted to believe that wasn't the case.

He thought he knew someone. Someone as in Kydraa. He taught her how to write on parchment so long ago. He eased her into talking to other padawan at the temple. She taught him to be more gentle, considerate, and quiet. A lot of Kydraa is who he is today and it hurt to actually be an individual apart from everyone else when he shared so much with a girl he grew up with— maybe he was giving her too much credit. Her fall was seemingly out of left field, he couldn't exactly fathom how things took a turn for the worst. Again, he plunged deeper into his mind, passing over the surface and through the past.

It was right after his battle with the dark ended. A heavy weight was taken off his young shoulders and seemingly vanished. Only then did Kydraa stop talking to the others. Leta was too 'bossy' for her taste, Plivatti was 'childish'... the list went on as good words formed into bad ones, even lunging to her own master. He remembered her words like moonlight on a summer's night. 𝘏𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙣.

Ben tasted his lips, letting all the things he was blind to fold in with fragile help of gravity. It was there from the start and nobody was listening. Ben was living in his own bliss, too stupid to parallel the same words he spoke deep in a rut of black. The difference was, he kicked and screamed in agony. It must've been an unprecedented amount of time Kydraa was suffering in silence.

𝘾𝙇𝘼𝙋

"Ben! Ben are you with me?" Leia was now sitting down, her head lolled to the side and a more motherly, concerned look was splayed over her wrinkled face. "You don't know how much trouble the resistance is in. I need you here with me. I can't let you slip away. I know it's hard, and I might be mean but please just talk to me."

Ben lifted his heavy head, guilt spilling into his gut in realization. He stared back at his mother as if he was going to cry, giving in to the look of stress she gave off. He couldn't let her handle the burden of another war in the wake of his own actions. "I had to... Kydra— 𝘴𝘩𝘦 was going to kill them. There's still another person out there I know. I'm doing my part I didn't want to make it anymore.." he sucked in a breath, eyes flashing over to Alirei with her knees to her chest, frowning. "..hard for you."

"Son," Leia placed her hand on Ben's cheek, guiding his face to look back at her. "I understand. You're young and like your father. History sadly repeats it's self and I can't quite testify and say I was any different. It's the rebel mentality but jeez, Ben. I'm too old for this."

The moment Leia brought up Han he remembered what that prissy Chiss said. He told Ben all about the divorce— how it's supposed to be under wraps. He let the impulsivity subside for now, biting his tongue and nodding along willingly to his mother.