MY LAST SAD DAYS

C-1: BITTERSWEET 18s- Part I

The summer was ending, and a new semester was beginning, if you ask me if I was excited, not really, but as Robert said, I had to be positive, a new beginning is always an opportunity to change what we don't like and to make life the home of our most cherished dreams.

That morning I woke up to a big bang on my bedroom door and loud music in the living room.

-"Sammy, get up, you'll be late,"- he repeated over and over as he knocked on the door.

-"Go away, I know my duties, Robert"- i shouted at him as i put my head on the pillow.

-"And i know my obligations, don't force me to come in, Sammy"- answered with a smile on his face, and then he went downstairs to prepare breakfast.

Robert has been the happiest person I have ever met, even when the situation became more complex he had something positive to say to cheer me up, i never saw him angry, except when he pretended to be to convince me not to call him Robert but dad or whatever denomination that didn't make him look like a stranger when there were people around.

I struggled with my desire to stay in bed and get ready to start the day, Robert offered to drive me to college, so i didn't have to worry about time, although I did prefer the bus, lately the most exciting thing in my life was the ride from home to college and back, I always felt that public transportation was a good place to let my imagination run wild.

-"Welcome to your destination miss, today will be a great day to shine," he said in a radio announcer's voice.

-"I'd rather not, Robert, I'll settle for just breathing,"- i said getting out of the car with one stitch.

-"But if you're my sunshine, honey, you don't stop shining... even if you don't want to" -Looking out the window while laughing.

-"I'm not, Robert," - i replied as i got lost in the crowd of students entering the science building.

The first class of the day was Language, when i entered the auditorium there were only a few students, some were talking to each other and others were checking their cell phones. I sat in one of the back chairs trying to make as little noise as possible so as not to intrude with my presence. I could only recognize a few classmates from last semester, smiled at them discreetly and put on my headphones so that there would be no doubt that I was fine being alone while they talked about their vacations and other trivia.

-Good morning guys," - i heard a young woman with a tanned face and a curvaceous figure enter the auditorium carrying a briefcase and some leaves in her hands.

We were shocked and impressed by the youthfulness of the teacher, did not often see young teachers giving university classes and even less so in a public university.

-"Good morning,"- we replied in unison.

-"I love that morning energy,"- she said in a very charismatic voice.

Her dress was discreet, I could sense that she was the type of woman who has been led to believe that the female body is the worst enemy of professionalism, if you want to be taken seriously you have to cover up as much as possible, not to expose any part of the skin which lends itself to the play of imagination. She wore baggy black trousers, a blue button-down shirt covered by a black blazer, half a heeled shoe, her hair up, little make-up, and a permanent smile which implied that she enjoyed what she was doing.

-Welcome to your first language class, my name is Marisse Bals, I would like to tell you in advance about my life and that you should do the same, but we are going to omit that important part for now because it will be the central axis of the next sections, I warn you once and for all that in this class we are going to talk a lot, so if any of you have problems to communicate we will be your group therapy, ¿don't you think that is fabulous?

- "The purpose of Language is to connect us. Communication will be our most powerful weapon, that is why making use of our capacity to socialize we will form work groups, you will be able to decide with whom you will work, but there are two conditions; that the groups be diverse, that is, try to find partners that you haven't talked to before, the second condition is the easy one; you should send me an email with the names of the group members, if you can do this i will have to make a very difficult decision to form the groups, and i warn you that i am not good at choosing people, so it is up to you"-

The work groups generated a certain anxiety in me, not because i preferred to work alone, but because of what happens once the teacher says that groups must be formed, there are those who automatically know who will be part of their group, either because they already have a work methodology or simply because they are friends, there are those who with one look confirm their participation, and then there are those who look everywhere and wait for someone to say that they need a member to complete their group. I would have preferred the teacher to form the groups and avoid another moment of self-deception, but life always finds ways to ratify you through small details that not everything is as you want it to be.