Its a Challenge (Big Time Rush)

Oh so you think I'm sexy?

I sat down on James' bed and waited for him to get out. 

"Hello." James says pulling his towel tight to his waist. I look at his abs, and his very promanent V. "You like what you see?"

"Course I do." I say and smile, He drops his towel but I turn away just in time. "JAMES!" 

"Oh relax, it's not like it hasn't happened before, mine is like no other." James says I hear him pull on pants and a shirt. I sit silently. Truth is, yeah, I have seen them before. I used to be very promiscuous. How ever the hell you spell that.

"Yeah but it doesn't mean I want your ding-a-ling hanging out all over the place." I say and James laughs, I do too.

He grabs my hand and we walk downstairs, I pull it away when I see Kendall. He is sitting downstairs huddled in the corner, reading. His eyes were red and he had a glass of some liquor next to him. 

"Where are you two going?" He asks  narrowing his eyes at us.

"Dinner." James says and I suddenly feel like crying. I still miss Kendall, he made me feel pretty, like a princess, warm and happy.

"Let me get something first." I say and we walk into my room. I close the door. "Can we not go to dinner."

"Well what would you like to do instead." James asks, "It's almost nine."

"Would it be wierd if we just talked." I say and he shakes his head. 

"I'd like that." He says and we walk over to the blankets and lay down, I lie next to him. 

"If you don't mind... when did you start cutting yourself." I ask James, he looks down at me. 

"I was about your age." James says, "I was upset because I wasn't getting any auditions. Everyone was telling me I was too... pretty, handsome." He says choking up. 

"I'm sorry." I say, "I- didn't mean to push you."

"I like you asking questions, no one ever does." James says, "At least not the right ones... When did you start smoking?"

"My best friend Amanda... she killed herself, and I started hanging out with the wrong people. It started with weed, and then went to cigarettes, I was fourteen. But now I do it cause I'm addicted."

"Who buys it for you?" he asks

"My uncle." I say

"He let's you smoke?" James asks astonished

"Yeah, he's the only one who understands me. I only get one pack every two weeks." I say

"I don't think he should do that." He says

"It helps me James." I say, "It really does."

"Bella... I'm not gonna start with the whole lung cancer suff... because frankly, I think it's sexy when you smoke. But it's awful that you do." He says and I blush.

"So you think I'm sexy?" I ask him 

"I guess so." James says and I feel my cheeks getting hot. "I'm making you blush missy,"

"I guess you are." I say, 

"Did you love Kendall?" he asks and I shrug

"I don't know yet, I really don't know him. You know? It's like me saying I love you, I'ts just... to much." I say and James nods.

"Well, why don't you love me?" James asks laughing and i smile rolling my eyes. Even though I was hungry, I pushed it away, cause I loved talking to James.

"I don't know you." I say and smile at him, "Wanna watch a movie?"

"Maybe, I kind of like talking though." James says, and I grab his shoulder.