If You Were Gone

If You Were Gone (3)

    Chapter 3

     This man was slowly making his way to the stand. He was moving as if his whole body ached with pain. He had a round belly, a pointy nose, and thin silvery white hair that blended in with his skin tone. He was undoubtfully old. The wrinkles that covered his body made me reach up and touch my smooth and wrinkle-free face.

     After what seemed like hours of painful waiting and watching, the priest finally made it to the mic stand. He took a deep breath. "Mariah Cauthers. She was a special person to all of us..."

     I immediately tuned out the man. For some reason I was mad that he was talking about my sister like that. Like he knew her. He never met her and here he is preaching about her like they have been best friends since birth. He shouldn't be preaching about someone that he never knew. This was probably the first time he ever laid eyes on her.

     I think I'm the only one that is mad about this guy talking about my little sister. This made me even more mad. Her family and close friends should be talking about Mariah and how we love her and how much we miss her. Not this man.

      After the old man recited something from the bible he asked us to close our eyes. I looked around and saw everyone with their eyes shut. I looked back up at the priest who was staring at me with his blue, sleepy eyes. He nodded and mouthed out "Go on." I sighed and closed my eyes.

      "Now," The priest said in a soft voice that could be heard throughout the packed room due to the extreme quiet. The only foreign noise was the occasional sob or sniffle. "I want you all to think of Mariah."

      Almost instantly I saw Mariah. Her untamed brown hair was falling over her round face. Light freckles spread across her round nose and rosy cheeks. Her dazzling smile was spread across her face, bringing laughter to her light brown eyes.

      "Ok," The old man said again. "I want you all to remember Mariah. Remember how she was and how she brought joy to our lives."

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       "Mariah?" I called out to her in the middle of the night. I heard her shifting around in her bed. No response. Normally, I would walk over to my older sisters room and sleep in her bed, but Clarissa was on a trip to Europe for her school. Unfair.

      I turned over in my bed and looked at the alarm clock. In bright red numbers, it said that it was 2:34 am. I sighed. I knew I was a chicken. Who gets scared watching CSI?

      Mariah and I had been up until one o'clock in the morning watching a marathon of CSI. We had fun guessing who killed the pool boy or kidnapped the snobby guys girlfriend. Our guesses were way off, but we always had fun being detectives through the various characters of the show.

      I had been laying in bed, staring at the dark roof for over an hour and a half. I kept hearing a noise outside my window, which was located right next to my window. The noise sounded like someone stepped on a twig. My mind raced. What if it was a person that was going to kidnapped me? Or kill me? Or hold me hostage to get money from my parents? Would I be the next victim of the newest episode of Real World: CSI?

      "Mariah?" I whispered louder so she could hear me. I heard her loss again in her bed. "Mariah, are you up?"

      Then in a sleepy voice, she answered. "Well, I am now." I could sense a bit of annoyance in her voice. "What do you want?"

      "Did you hear that noise?" I asked. All of a sudden I felt stupid. Of course she didn't hear that noise. She could barely hear me calling to her.

      "What noise?" She asked, her voice half asleep.

      I sighed. "A noise outside the window."

      "I'm sure it was nothing, Kasey. Just go back to sleep."

      "Um, yeah. I guess it was nothing," I answered half heartedly. I was half expecting Mariah to burst out in laughter and to start making fun of me. 

      I never heard the laughter. Instead, I heard Mariah's bed squeak. That was followed by the soft patting noise of her foot sinking into the carpet. I felt my bed sink in at the foot of my bed.

      "Did you want me to stay up with you?" She asked, her voice soft and sincere.

      I was taken back. Why wasn't she making fun of me? If I was in her position I wouldn't be sitting on the foot of her bed, offering to stay up with her. I'd tell her that she is going crazy and go back to sleep without a second thought.

      However, here she was. Offering me something that I didn't deserve. She is giving me her hand even when She knows that I wouldn't do the same. I reached up and took her hand.

      That night, we stayed up all night and talked. I learned a lot about my little sister that night. I found out that she had a huge crush on this guy in her band class, who was a grade younger. She wanted to know if it was weird that she likes him. I told her that it's not and that she shouldn't worry because when I was her age I used to have a crush on a boy who was younger. She laughed. So did I.

      That night changed our relationship in a way. Yes we still fought over who had to do the dishes, but now it's like we had our own little secret. Every time one of us couldn't sleep the other would automatically stay up with the other. It was a silent pact that was made up on the night she offered up herself and I accepted it.

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        I didn't notice it, but I was crying again. Lately, it felt as if crying was part of my daily routine. I'd wake up with red eyes due to crying myself to sleep, I'd eat breakfast, sit with my parents; who were usually in a depressed state, go hang out with Daniel who was usually laying down in his bed. That was how I spent the past couple of days. Sometimes I would switch the order of things.

      Clarissa reached over and put a piece of tissue in my hand. I clenched it up in my hand, turning it into a ball. I brought up to my eye and wiped away the tears.

     I kept thinking about that night on my bed. It seemed so far away and so simple and yet it was a memory that I will always cherish and hold dear to my heart. Now, I will have sleepless nights with no one to talk to. I will only have myself. No Mariah to calm my nerves.

      I kept on crying.