The Real Life of Me

Chapter 4

I laid there on the ground for a few minutes waiting to be beat some more but instead nothing just nothing. "Are you coming?" Mike said as he started to walk away.  Slowly I gathered the strength to push myself to my knees and then I forced myself to stand up. When I got home that day I went straight to my room. Marcus was already in there sitting on his bed playing with his little trucks. He didn't even look up when I walked in. I flopped on my bed and screamed into my pillow.  I had a decision to make. I could ask my mom what to do or I could just deal with the pain.  Being seven I made the best decision I could and that was to just keep my mouth shut. My choice had nothing to do with protecting myself but with protecting my mother. Since her and Casstel had become so close I had actually seen her smiling.  She was really smiling not like that fake smile she did when she was trying to be brave. Even as a child I knew that my father was the reason for this.  I didn't want to ruin my mothers last possible chance of having a real friend. Something that truly made her happy. To me it seemed selfish to do that to my mom. I tried each day to talk him out of walking down the ally but it never worked. It went on for a few more days until one night I had gotten stuck in my t-shirt and mom had to help me out of it so I could take my bath. She quickly knowtised the bruises that covered my back and legs. "Oh my god Juilieann where did these come from?" she said panicked. I tried to lie "I must have rolled out of my bed last night." but the tears welling up in my eyes gave me away.  I quickly told her and she promised she would fix it. Until then I just tried to deal with it until one day I snapped. It started like another day he kept yanking on my backpack with one hand and beating me with the other. When suddenly I flew forward and hit my face off the gravel road. I sat up and examined my Barbie backpack. The fabric the handle was sewn to was almost completely ripped off and the main pocket was torn open.  Without saying a word I stood up and yelled "I hate you! You wrecked my backpack my nana sent me from back home! It can't just be replaced! I don't even want to be here! I hate B.C almost as much as I hate you!" before I turned to take off running. Normally Mike could easily catch me but I told myself I had to run as hard and fast as I could.  As soon as I made it out of the ally and on to our road I stopped dead in my tracks because I saw mom and Casstel standing infront of the small park before our building. I slowly walked over to them and forced out "Mom I don't feel good can I go home...please?". "Don't be silly some fresh air will make you feel better!" She beamed. I sat alone at the picnic table until mom waved me over. I went and sat by her and stayed quiet until I tried to ask "Did you tell Casstel yet?". "No, not yet. If he keeps doing it I will." she whispered. Little did we know Casstel could hear us, "Tell me what?" she ask calmly. Then infront of Mike, Marcus and  Mila I had to tell Casstel about my after school routine. Casstel always told me from day one that I could always tell her anything. When I finished she yelled at him in Philippians and sent him home. Then she hugged me and apologized. That day I had a new found hope that my daily walk home would be much easier.  Little did I know things were going to get much worse. On Friday the walk home seem so much longer. Mike still hit me but not as hard. Neither of us spoke a word the whole way home. When I got home the door was locked so I knocked but there was no answer. I knew that mom never really went anywhere. "She must be at Casstel's." I said out loud even though I was the only one around.  I managed to drag my self up the two sets of stairs and down to Casstel's apartment door. Her door was always left wide open when she was home. Still I knocked. "Casstel...Casstel Is my mom here?" I said waiting to hear or see someone. "Hi sweetie, your parents took Marcus with them into Edmonton to the dealership. They asked me to watch you tonight." Casstel said in her motherly voice appearing from around the corner.  She made me a snack and talked with me for a while before she had to drop Mila off somewhere. I was left there with Mike and I was scared.  I wanted to run and hide. He was actually normal to me the whole night he thought me my tens times tables. Marcus got dropped off at ten thirty and we had to sleep there that night.