Are You Having A Good Time, Sweetheart?

Chapter Eighteen: I'm Alright

Thursday.

The lights were too bright again. It was morning though. Alex could tell because it was even brighter than last night.

His head didn't feel as heavy.

He opened his eyes.

His mom wasn't in the room. She'd either gone home for the night or to the cafeteria, or just to go cry or something about her failure of a son.

It didn't matter.

Dr. Stanley walked into the room.
"Alex" He greeted politely. He took a seat where Isobel had been last time he saw her.
"What's going on?"

Alex sighed, "read the chart. I told your nurse all about it. Every detail." He mumbled.

Dr. Stanley nodded, "I did read your chart. I'm glad that you were so open. I want to ask a few more questions though, if that's alright?" He smiled a bit.

Psychiatrists. Therapists. They were all so nice. It almost made Alex want to vomit.
He glanced at the clock on the wall, it was eight AM.

"Shoot." Alex responded, then laughed darkly at himself. More irony. He wished someone would put a bullet in him right now.

Dr. Stanley gave him a look. It was hard for Alex to read, although he wasn't really trying to.

"How long have you been cutting?" Dr. Stanley asked.

Alex looked down at his very angry wounds, "I never stopped."

"How long have you been having the bad panic attacks and hearing the voice?" Dr. Stanley specified because Alex had always had panic attacks. No one expected them to stop. They just expected them to calm down.

"I don't know. Six months. After you upped my last dose again." Alex shrugged a little.

"Okay. First and foremost, I need you to tell me when these things happen. I know that it's hard, and I know that you disassociate from anything and everything, but I do need you to tell me when things change. Okay?" He was gentle too. All people on the psych floor were.

Alex nodded. "Sorry."

Dr. Stanley nodded back, "I'm going to change your medication. When we sedated you, we stopped the Prozac completely. We currently have you on a drip of Lexapro. When you are released, I expect you to take it daily, however, it will be monitored. Your mother or father will give your dosage to you each day until I decide otherwise. Are you in agreement with that?"

"Do I have a choice"

Dr. Stanley sighed a little, "You always have a choice, Alexander, but I am strongly urging you to let me help you to help yourself. Can we try to do that?"

Alex nodded and looked up at the IV bags again. So there were three after all. Saline. Then the other two were most likely pain medications and the new Lexapro.

He looked back down at his lap. "Are you really keeping me until Saturday? Or do I get to go home?" Finally a real question. He wanted to be home.

Dr. Stanley shook his head, "I want to see how you're doing tomorrow, then we'll decide. Get some rest. Your body has been through a lot. I'll be in to speak with you later today." He patted Alex on the shoulder and walked out of the room.

Alex thought he'd have some alone time, but he was grateful that he didn't the second he saw who was walking through the door.
His raven haired boy.

He tried to smile. It didn't really work. He wanted to, but he couldn't bring himself to do it.

Jack took the same seat Dr. Stanley was just in and scooted it as close to Alex as he could. He took Alex's hand and held it. Alex laced his fingers with Jack's.
Jack smiled at that, "Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to hold my hand back?" He asked.