M'y weekly Articles

6-emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence

Hello everyone first of all before reading this I request you to play this song : Harder than easy by jack savoretti

« Anyone can became angry , that's is easy , but to be angry with the right person , to the right degree , at the right time , for the right purpose, and the right way ___ this is not easy »

ARISTOTLE , The Nicomacbean Etbics
Each time I read this quote  I think more about the value of understanding and being aware of what  surround us , and noticing every single events rationally. People believe that the intelligence can only be compared to your educational qualifications , how fast you are at analyzing and understanding riddles ... , while in fact there isn't just that kind of intelligence, there is another kind that may help you to manage and fix some issues that your mind only couldn't fix , such as lack of communication , lack of expression , lack of understanding so we would be just lost far apart away from our society and that would effect negatively in our mental health , and we question a lot of questions: Are our emotions accompanied by physical sensations that we experience in places like our stomach, throat, or chest?
Do we experience individual feelings and emotions, such as anger, sadness, fear, and joy, each of which is evident in subtle facial expressions?
Can we experience intense feelings that are strong enough to capture our attention and that of others?
Do you pay attention to your emotions? Do they factor into your decision making?
How can we be aware of ourselves and our needs ?
To answer such question let's first talk about  :

Emotional intelligence (otherwise known as emotional quotient or EQ) Emotional intelligence (otherwise known as emotional quotient or EQ) is the ability to understand, use, and manage your own emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges and defuse conflict. Emotional intelligence helps you build stronger relationships, succeed at school and work, and achieve your career  and personal goals. It can also help you to connect with your feelings, turn intention into action, and make informed decisions about what matters most to you.

Why is the emotional intelligence important?
success isn't always related to smartness
You may know a lot of people who are academically brilliant, but their personal lives sucks , are they happy ?
Yes of cours that being smart and having a high IQ is such a blessing it helps you get to college and to achieve some high goals , but the IQ isn't enough to provide a happy life for you where you can  manage your  emotions and feelings while being aware of yourself so your EQ is needed too to live a healthy life with a healthy mental state  .
IQ and EQ exist in tandem and are most effective when they build off one another.
We ask how can we being emotionally intelligent ? I would answer by following this majors point :
-Self-management In order for you to engage your EQ, you must be able use your emotions to make constructive decisions about your behavior. When you become overly stressed, you can lose control of your emotions and the ability to act thoughtfully and appropriately.
Think about a time when stress has overwhelmed you. Was it easy to think clearly or make a rational decision? Probably not. When you become overly stressed, your ability to both think clearly and accurately assess emotions your own and other people's becomes compromised.
Emotions are important pieces of information that tell you about yourself and others, but in the face of stress that takes us out of our comfort zone, we can become overwhelmed and lose control of ourselves. With the ability to manage stress and stay emotionally present, you can learn to receive upsetting information without letting it override your thoughts and self-control. You'll be able to make choices that allow you to control impulsive feelings and behaviors, manage your emotions in healthy ways, take initiative, follow through on commitments, and adapt to changing circumstances.
-Self-awareness
Managing stress is just the first step to building emotional intelligence. The science of attachment indicates that your current emotional experience is likely a reflection of your early life experience. Your ability to manage core feelings such as anger, sadness, fear, and joy often depends on the quality and consistency of your early life emotional experiences. If your primary caretaker as an infant understood and valued your emotions, it's likely your emotions have become valuable assets in adult life. But, if your emotional experiences as an infant were confusing, threatening or painful, it's likely you've tried to distance yourself from your emotions.
But being able to connect to your emotions having a moment-to-moment connection with your changing emotional experience is the key to understanding how emotion influences your thoughts and actions.
-Social awareness
Social awareness enables you to recognize and interpret the mainly nonverbal cues others are constantly using to communicate with you. These cues let you know how others are really feeling, how their emotional state is changing from moment to moment, and what's truly important to them. When groups of people send out similar nonverbal cues, you're able to read and understand the power dynamics and shared emotional experiences of the group. In short, you're empathetic and socially comfortable.
-Relationship management
Working well with others is a process that begins with emotional awareness and your ability to recognize and understand what other people are experiencing. Once emotional awareness is in play, you can effectively develop additional social/emotional skills that will make your relationships more effective, fruitful, and fulfilling.
-read more , listen more specially to yourself , try to be understanding more and give a chance when it's needed
Emotional intelligence will effect positively -in your performances school or work : your communication skills will get more developed which can make you lead and motivate others, and excel in your career. In fact, when it comes to gauging important job candidates
-It does also effect on Your physical health. If you're unable to manage your emotions, you are probably not managing your stress either. This can lead to serious health problems. Uncontrolled stress raises blood pressure, suppresses the immune system, increases the risk of heart attacks and strokes, contributes to infertility, and speeds up the aging process. The first step to improving emotional intelligence is to learn how to manage stress.
-And also Your mental health. Uncontrolled emotions and stress can also impact your mental health, making you vulnerable to anxiety and depression. If you are unable to understand, get comfortable with, or manage your emotions, you'll also struggle to form strong relationships. This in turn can leave you feeling lonely and isolated and further exacerbate any mental health problems.
-Your relationships. By understanding your emotions and how to control them, you're better able to express how you feel and understand how others are feeling. This allows you to communicate more effectively and forge stronger relationships, both at work and in your personal life.
-Your social intelligence. Being in tune with your emotions serves a social purpose, connecting you to other people and the world around you. Social intelligence enables you to recognize friend from foe, measure another person's interest in you, reduce stress, balance your nervous system through social communication, and feel loved and happy.

  What about Developing emotional awareness ?
It's important that you learn how to manage stress first, so you'll feel more comfortable reconnecting to strong or unpleasant emotions and changing how you experience and respond to your feelings.
So after this small introduction of the emotional intelligence do you feel like you are aware of yourself ? Do you feel like you are good at managing and fixing a bad heart or even yours ?
If yes tell me your story in the comments below and tell us what did you do to manage it ?
Link of the song in the comment section