Dead?

To keep a dead man waiting

He knew what happened, of course he did. He was just dead, not dumb, far from that in fact. He figured he'd probably be whisked to a trial room by now, where a few long nosed curly haired men in long black robes would rattle away all his sins from a scroll or something , and then sentence  him to hell for kissing his parrot despite knowing how much she hates it just because she had that nasty habit of stealing all the good food from his plate . Call him sexist but he just couldn't see him being  sentenced by women, those deed reading judges had always been men in his head,  wrinkly old men.

Now,it wasn't like Kai looked forward to being in hell or something. In fact he'd never tried getting deep fried and thawed whilst alive, but then again it was one of those things he just knew he wouldn't enjoy, like being squashed by a meteorite or being gutted by Jack The Ripper, so yeah, good ole hell was not going to be fun. Not that he had an actual choice, he was definitely no saint. To add insult to the injury he was gay, very gay, so if god was as homophobic as most priests made him out to be, it was straight to hell for Kai. He figured they weren't the type to sway to a s'more or something , 'cause the only non-foodie bribes he was okay offering were the ones that could be bought off a thrift store.

Would that play any role in the way he was treated in hell? To be steak was one thing but to be cheap steak? No, just no. Not that all that mattered right now, because he was still "here", standing in an old dusty cemetery that he couldn't get out of, probably waiting for the big guy? Death ? The Grim Reaper? or some whatsit to ferry him to wherever he had to be next, hopefully. He just couldn't imagine haunting such a boring place for the rest of eternity and hell, wasn't he supposed to haunt some place he felt a connection to? like the town library or the Vet's place? Not some old cemetery that he'd never been to in his entire life!

Kai slammed his fist on a gravestone. " Doesn't death bloody know not to keep a dead man waiting!" The action didn't give him relief he wanted though , not when his fist passed straight through the gravestone but his face didn't care enough to do the same when it met the floor.

hiya guyz....

hope you enjoyed the read...comment? Constructive  criticism is definitely welcome and so are votes ;).  Stay safe

Yewrose is out!