heat waves // dirkjake

part one

It was so hot, and you swear the heat was messing with your head. It penetrated the cooling system you've worked on for so long to fight off the regular summer days. Usually overnight there was a cool breeze coming off the ocean surrounding your home which the a/c unit collected and used in the morning organically and then recycled in order to keep the house cool until sunset, but apparently not today. You've already taken two cold showers this morning and really don't want to take another one until you are done sweating all the fluids you've managed to swallow from every pore on your body. At this point, you've given up and sprawled out in your boxers on the tile floor, the coldest thing you could lay on. Tile seemed to soak up the chill in the room, making it freezing on your feet in the early mornings. You could sleep with socks on to stop this from happening, but what animal would sleep with socks on? It was a summer day you had only read about online, one which was so hot it stopped you from doing anything but think about how uncomfortably warm you are. Is it physically possible for a human to get this hot without being incredibly sick? You think yes, but can't bring yourself to put you or your already overheating computers through the suffering of searching it up to be sure. Even Hal seems to have been shut down for the day, which you can't remember if you did that or not. At this point you're surprised that you haven't shut down yet.

You also begin to wonder how your friends are doing. After spending a whole day and a half not actually speaking to them, they are probably worried. Yesterday you busied yourself with tasks you needed to be done and told Hal to not allow any distractions while you worked. When you woke up next you were sweating in places you didn't know you could sweat and half of your computers were already threatening to overheat. You wondered how they were doing right now, besides their possible worried states of "Where Did Dirk Disappear Off To Now?" The more you think about it, you realize there have been plenty of times where you go missing for a few days at a time and come back as if nothing happened. This usually either happens when your insomnia gets bad and you eventually cave of exhaustion, or you throw yourself into a project and don't stop for anything until it gets finished, which could mean days of not sleeping or refusing to even speak to Hal or Sawtooth. One example is when you worked on Lil Seb, which took you multiple days and sleepless nights, with one exception where you decided to take a shower and almost fell asleep in there. It was very worth it for Jane's birthday present though. When you finally started talking to them again, they were worried and showed it but didn't ask since by then it had been recurring. You can tell they want to ask, but they know you won't say for any multitude of reasons. Your friends, although many years and many miles away, have really helped you to get through these years. Spending eternity in a tower above an ocean with only your creations to keep you company is a lot less lonely when you can reach out and have a connection to them even through a screen. Your eyes grow heavy as you think about the three best people in your life. They really do mean the world to you, whether or not you'd ever admit it out loud. Your body begins to feel heavy against the hardwood floor, and you allow yourself to fall into a quiet sleep.

Derse was much, much cooler than the heat surrounding your waking self. For a millisecond you wonder if you died somehow, but immediately squash such a stupid idea. You know better than that. Wherever you'd end up would not be the dark droopiness of your dersian ceiling staring you down the moment you ceased to live. If anything, death would probably just be a void, nothingness which you wouldn't even be able to comprehend due to the lack of existence. You decide to go and check on Roxy while you're here, since you wont really know when your waking self will be up and running again. The purple kingdom worked as it always did, somehow unaware of you being awake and Roxy always sleepwalking. You assume that either they aren't very perceptive or just don't bother to look up. You kind of watch them, and they look like what you'd assume ants looked like. In her tower she sleeps in her bed, peacefully. Her chest rises up and down softly, her hair a pink crown around her head. You didn't even know she dyed her hair, but it suits her you think. It's interesting to note that the change in hair color carried over to your dream selves, but it makes sense. How would your hair be the same length or your tattoo carry over otherwise? It would definitely be interesting to give yourself two haircuts rather than one, although you think you've gotten good at cutting hair. You sit on a chair located at a desk, and watch her while pondering your friends once more.

Instead of going back to your tower, you decide to stay with her in hers, just in case she starts to wander off again. You wouldn't want to admit to yourself that the main reason is you kind of miss them, your friends, even though you haven't met in person. It's a deep aching that for a long time you'd think will never get fulfilled. Holding another person in your arms seems life changing. Their warmth surrounding you in a hug, the soft or roughness of their hands as they touch you with caring. It sounds amazing and terrifying all at the same time. You could only read about these things in old books and various fanfictions, what it actually means to have a physical connection with someone who's right next to you literally. On Derse, you've had to touch Roxy in order to get her back to her tower plenty of times, but theres something unsatisfying about it. It lacks a certain warmth and spark. It's an empty touch, like they are split into two and one has all the human existence whereas the other is just a vessel.

If Roxy was able to come see you right now, you wouldn't hesitate to give her the biggest hug, and probably almost crush her to death just trying to physically show how much you love her. You'd spend time with her, show her Hal. If you could see Jane you'd somehow figure out how to show that you'd be there to protect her in a heartbeat, but that you know she's a strong and capable young woman and she could be anything she'd ever want to be. You'd let her bake for you, even if you hate Crockercorp and almost everything its associated with. If you saw Jake, you wouldn't know what to do. Your stupid feelings for him grow ever stronger as time passes by and you wouldn't want to alarm him, but you'd want to be there for him in a way that just a normal bro wouldn't. You'd want to be side-by-side with him in all his little adventures, making sure he'd make it out fine every time. You'd be the one sparring and training with him instead of Brobot. You have no clue if you'd tell him about how you feel. You've never thought it would've been a possibility. You used to think that as you aged you find the technology to be with Roxy, and out of some stupid responsibilty that because you were the last two people alive you'd have children or something. You knew something would come along and you two wouldn't be damned here, almost like a feeling that something bigger would make sure that didn't happen, but on those hopeless days you couldn't help but think that you'd be stuck here forever, either alone or with Roxy, and your all of your ancestors preparation would be for naught.

You don't know how long you spend in Roxy's company in Derse, but when you come back to reality its dark outside and seems to have finally started to cool down. Peeling yourself off the tile, your body is covered in dry sweat and feels horrendous. The first thing you do is shower, and get into fresh clothes which finally don't feel like they are suffocating and adding to the rising temperatures. Towel draped across your neck, you decide to wait a moment before turning on all your electronics again. The silence would usually put you off, as you prefer all the noise of the machines whirring. To you, they take away the reminder that you seemed to be doomed to be alone forever. You sit in your chair, staring out the small window into the watery distance. Nothing but ocean and skyline stretched on for miles, the same view you've had for fifteen years. Nothing pops into your usually active mind, giving you some sort of peace for the moment. It's quiet, but not bad. Almost comforting, to take a moment and cool off, figuratively and literally. What usually makes you restless now gives you the slightest bit of hope. Maybe everything will turn out okay in the end.