Who Matters The Most? |SaruMi|

2

“Who matters the most to you right now?”
“Anna.”
“Go to Anna! Helping her was more important than my life!”
And then the roof fall down.
- NOO! – Misaki woke up with a loud cry. He shouldn’t have let Saruhiko behind.
The whole human race could go and fuck themself. It wasn’t worth to save the world if it cost Saru’s life.

The previous few days he mostly spent alone in his apartment, locking out everyone. He wasn’t ready to face them, to talk to them.
He tried it once to act normal, on the second day, but people kept telling him the life goes on, and they didn’t realize that it scared Misaki even more. He didn’t want the life to go on without Saruhiko in it.

Misaki was just exhausted, both mentally and physically, he couldn’t sleep, because of the nightmares or he woke up crying after a dream with Saruhiko, and sometimes for a few moments after waking up he forgot everything, just so it could hit him harder every time the reality fell on him. 

Kamamoto brought him food every day, but nothing got down on his throat.  He couldn’t recall the last time he found enough strength in himself to change his clothes, and really nobody could expect him to put effort in anything as useless as showering. He won’t be around people a lot either way.

He was back in the bar for an hour in the last two days; at least he could bring some booze with him.

On the first days the Blue King sent his interns, to check on him but Misaki overheard them gossiping about how he doesn’t have any right to behave like this, they hated each other, so with the way he acts he is just seeking attentions. After that Misaki threatened them to burn alive every single Blue who appears near his apartment again, so they left him alone. Not like he could have done it, Yatagarasu, the vanguard of Homra, lost his flames, he just couldn’t make the Red aura appear again, there was not enough will in him to fight anyone anymore.

Right now Misaki was trying to sleep again, but his eyes were open, his mind blank. There wes a bottle lying next to him, he had a few drinks just to take the pain away, but it wasn’t enough. Maybe if he calls Kamamoto, he will buy him more.

He dialed his partner’s number on his personalized PDA watch.
This watch, it was a gift from Saru, he made it for him.
- Yata-san! – A happy voice answered almost immediately.
 Misaki’s tongue went weak, and he couldn't say anything at all. He quickly ended the call before the loud sobs escaped his mouth, followed with unarticulated screams.

“Who matters the most to you right now?”
“Anna.”

Misaki was haunted with their last conversation, he should have answered Saru, and he would tease him for it, make fun of him or call him idiot, but maybe then there wouldn’t be that pain in his chest right now. How he was supposed to cope with losing Saru? He was depressed for months after he left for Scepter 4, and now, everything seemed to get better, and he just fucking died. He left Misaki again. It was just too much to believe.

“Who matters the most to you right now?”
“Anna.”

They still didn’t found him, although the corpses of the two Kings were brought up already.
Misaki needed those drink now even more than before, maybe he could even get some medicine for sleep from Kusanagi.
_

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Misaki entered the bar in sweatpants, who cares what he looked like.
The only ones in there were Kusanagi and the Heartless Woman.  She was the only Blue Misaki didn’t want to kill at the moment. She tried to find Saru, and she cried for him, and that meant something important to the Homra’s vanguard.