Wroetofreezy One Shots

//27 - trapped

{REUPLOADED}

Concept: Harry suffers from a panic attack, and it's up to Cal to help calm him down.

[2020 words approx.]

//

Harry POV

Fear.

It has a different way of manifesting for every person it affects.

For me, it's a tram. An empty, rickety tram car. I can feel it moving, watching as nothing passes by in the windows but darkness. Even though there's nobody else around in this apparition, I always feel claustrophobic. Unable to breathe. The yellowish lights flicker and buzz, barely heard over the deafening sound of the tram moving along the tracks.

Where it's going, I never find out. I don't think I ever will.

Recently though, this fear has been at the forefront of my mind.

It's been affecting me more than I care to admit. At first, it was just a slight dizziness. That feeling, as if the floor is moving beneath my feet. It made me feel queasy whenever it happened.

But I didn't tell anyone.

The next part of my vision to bleed through was the sound. The roaring of the wheels, the echo of the tunnel. It fills my head, blocking me from hearing my surroundings. Making me feel even more disoriented.

But I still didn't tell anyone.

I have been lucky that so far, these things would only happen when I was alone. Perhaps lying in bed at night. Or while I was cooking food.

I haven't found a way to stop it yet. So I just have to sit down, and endure it. Sometimes it last five minutes, sometimes it lasts half an hour. But it always leaves me shaking, feeling weak and alienated from myself, on the verge of tears.

I don't know what's wrong with me.

I don't think anyone can save me from myself.

//

Cal POV

Something's up with Harry. That's been plain to me for months now.

He just isn't the same. He looks constantly exhausted, glazed over eyes with circles under them. The colour is gone from his cheeks. He's out battling demons alone, and refuses to accept that he needs help.

I didn't realise how bad it had got though. None of us had.

Until we saw his first 'attack'.

Harry and I were out for a walk with Lux, JJ and Vikk when it happened. Just around one of the local parks. Harry seemed to be doing alright that day. The shine was back in his eyes, and he smiled more than he had for ages.

Nothing could have prepared me for how suddenly it all started.

And when it all starts, he stops. Right in the middle of the dirt path we're walking down. We don't register it at first, but when I turn around to call for him, I see that look on his face.

He stands, lifeless, not blinking, his glassy eyes just staring at a far off place none of us can see.

"Harry?" I say cautiously, walking back to stand in front of him. He shows no indication of hearing me at all. His chest rises and falls rapidly, and I can see him beginning to tremble. He sways slightly, seeming unable to keep his balance. I reach out to grip his shoulders, but he hisses venomously at me.