Dad and I walked around some more and talked up a storm. I never noticed how alike we really are.
Dad and I both like to listen to instrumental songs, his is old composers, and mine are movie soundtracks. Dad is nervous to talk about himself sometimes, and I'm nervous when I talk about myself, because I ramble on about anything but that."... So then Levi found out that narwhals do exist." I explain. Looking at the confused smile on Dad's face told me I had lost him. "I tend to do that..."
Dad laughed. "I do that too, rambling to myself."
Himself? Does that mean he's lonely too?
"Are you hungry?" Dad asks.
"Starving." I reply. I skipped breakfast this morning due to showering and picking out clothes. One idea I had was curling my hair, but I realized that my hair will be forever straight. And I don't know how to curl my hair, and I don't own a single curling iron.We got lunch at the food truck that in the middle of the outlet. "Dad," I said, he looked up at me as he ate a French fry. "Do you like my friends?"
"Jax and Levi?" Dad asked. I nodded. Dad shifted in his seat. "I like them when they're around, I love them when they're not."
I laughed. "Wait, so, do you really like them?"
Dad laughed. "Of course I do, they're weird."
"That's the reason we're friends!" I exclaim.
Dad laughed. "Remind me when you guys met,"
"First grade," I said, "I saw the boys playing basketball, and I wanted to give it a go, they didn't let me play, but then I showed them who's boss at basketball."
"But you don't play, at all," Dad chuckles.
"Yeah... I... Too much exercise." I joke."Do you want to play sports?" Dad asks. A part of me wishes to say yes, but physically I have to say no.
"I can't," I tell him.
Dad looked at me confused. "Why?"
"Because my heart is screwy and I'd pass out or have a heart attack if it increases." I explain. Dad looks up at the sky thinking. How had he forgotten I could have a heart attack chasing after a ball.
"Oh yeah, I think you get that from my side." Dad says. I tilt my head to the side, getting interested.
"You have it too?" I ask. Dad shrugs. "So... It's genetic?"
Dad nods. "Yeah, I guess. When I run my heart feels like it's exploding."
"Mine aches. That's why I'm careful in gym." I explain.
"If you had the chance, would you want to play sports?" Dad asks.
I shrug. "It be cool. I mean, I don't really know sports that well. For instance if I played soccer, I'd make a basket for the other team." I explain. I pause, seeing Dad laugh. Something tells me there aren't baskets in soccer. I laugh along with Dad.This is a pretty fun day, even though we're just talking. Being honest, I'm going to be devastated that Dad will be going back to his job in a week. What will he do when I'm at school? Besides working. Does he think of me?
As usual, I may only get to see him in the morning, and at night.*************
An hour or so later, Dad and I head to the park. The park is probably the place I haven't been to in forever. Last time I came here was when I was... Eleven — no... I can't remember. I remember being younger than eleven.
Dad and I walk on the concrete path. "Dad," I say. He looked at me. "When do you think you'll be done with your research?" Dad looked off into a distance, probably thinking, then looked back at me.
"I don't know. Why? Is everything okay?" He asked.
No.
"Yeah," I answer, "Everything's fine."
It's really not.
Dad nodded. I didn't have the courage to tell him that I'm not okay. Physically, I'm fine. Mentally... I'm sick of having no one around me when in solitude. By not telling him, I thought it would make him feel like he's a horrible father — which he's not. Never has he been.It's not his fault that he needs to work. He does it so I can have education; so that we don't go broke.
"Kerry," Dad looks at me. "Are you ok?"
Can't you see I'm not? Can you figure it out without me hurting you?
"Yeah! I'm fine." I reply. I was smiling. It was fake.
"Are you sure? You look a little pale," Dad says.
Could you just... Stay with me?
"Dad," I forced a laugh. "I'm fine!"
No I'm not. I don't feel good, I don't feel like myself.
Dad put his arm around me, and I leaned on him a little. My head felt like a brick was in it; it hurt and was clogged up.We spent a few more hours at the park until the day had to end. Dad and I were heading out of the park, when I saw this kiosk with some cute bracelets. I didn't want a pink and fluffy one, but these leather brown ones with small strips of leather strung down with a few beads caught my eye. I told Dad to wait a minute. I bought 2, then went back up to Dad, and handed him one.
"For you," I smile, handing it to him. "And for me." I put mine on as he did too.
"I like these," Dad smiled. I smiled as we walked out of the park.Today was special to me. I'm glad I spent it with Dad. As Dad and I got to the car, he was going to his side, when I felt that pull again. It felt like I had a magnet inside of me, and it was attracting to another metal. As if I got hit by an invisible force, I was light headed and fumbled a bit. I shook off the feeling, and got into the car.
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( I w a n t a m c g r i d d l e )
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Being a Banner [ 1 of JA ]
FanfictionI didn't know what to think. Dad was gone, and this monster was here to replace him. An angry monster with extreme strength, who seemed to want me dead. There had to be a reason Dad was gone, and it had to be that I wasn't looking at him, but the mo...