What's The Feeling of 'THAT'

Chapter 5

-CHAPTER 5-

   «RAINIER»

      "What the---may sapi ka bro?" Bungad sa akin ng kapatid ko na kagigising lang. My brows immediately knitted when I saw him.

"What do you mean?" I asked with confusion and he giggled at me with an impish look.

"Why are you smiling on your own? Inlababo ka brader?" Ani niya na ikinagulat ko. My eyes widened. S-shet...I didn't noticed it.

Kanina pa pala ako ngumingiti ng mag-isa dito. Damn you Rainier...why am I smiling on my own???

Naisip ko lang naman yung baliw na si Cheena...di ko namalayang kanina pa pala ako ngumingiti. Di ko rin naman mapigilang ngumiti habang iniisip yung nangyari kahapon...

The moment I saw the big city...

The moment she hold my hand tightly...

That moment...

I still don't understand why my heart beats so fast whenever I think about those moments. Everytime I think about her genuine smile...it makes me smile too.

"Mind your own business asshole." Suplado kong bulyaw sa kanya ngunit ngumisi lang siya ulit sa akin ng nakakaloko.

"Hmm...mukhang in love ka talaga!" He teased and I immediately stared daggers at him.

In love...

It is obviously not...

I am not in love...I don't even know what love is. I don't even know what love feels like. I don't have knowledge about that thing called 'Love'.

I don't have romantic feelings for Cheena...

But now...I just want her to be my friend. I don't want to be just her classmate. I don't want to be a stranger to her.

I'm hanging out with her but we still don't know each other that much. The only thing I know about her is that she's a girl who has a rare heart disease. I want to know her more...I want to know why she keeps smiling despite of the heavy burdens she has. I want her to be my very first friend...

Since I was a kid, I never had any friends. I was so focused on studying and planning for my future. I never played outdoor games because I'm always busy playing video games. I always reject those people who tries and attempts to be their friend.

I always believe that friends are useless. They'll gonna left you in the end. No one will stay...

But...when I met her...my belief has changed. I want to be her friend. I want to hang out with her not as a stranger but as a friend.

"Stop smiling like that bro! It's creeping me out." Nangingilabot na ani ng kapatid ko and I just ignored him.

"By the way, mom texted me that babalik na naman daw siya sa Japan." He stated bago pa man ako makaalis sa bahay.

"Why?"

"May aasikasuhin daw siya doon. May meeting daw sila or whatever. And oh, hindi daw makakauwi sa papa bukas. Sa susunod month nalang daw muna." He answered and I just nodded.

Mom and dad is always busy with their business. Because of that, we barely talk to each other. Tinatawagan ko lang si mama pag may kailangan ako. Hindi ko naranasan makipagbonding with my parents.

But mom always attend school events. They may be busy but when it comes to recognition or graduation and awarding, hindi siya magpapahuli. Dad is always busy with his business in America and I understand.

They're doing all of it for us so I understand. We spend a little time with each other but I understand. Binigay naman nila lahat sa amin kahit minsan ay wala sila dito. They show their love by giving us materials and gifts...but I appreciate it.