Relative Strangers (Book 2) No Man Is An Island

27. Lack Of Humanity

"I knew he'd send you to follow me" sighed E, when Matt joined her on the roof of the ARC.
"We shouldn't be up here" admitted Matt, as he sat down on the floor by her side.
E shrugged, "You should know by now that I don't care about things like that".
"No, you go wherever you want" agreed Matt.
"Yes, I do"
"I hope you didn't take anything Lester said just now, to heart"
"He's right though"
"No he's not".

"Yes, he is. And the sad thing is, that I really have been trying to turn things around. I've been a cold heartless killer all my life, but I've been trying to become a better person. Sam opened me up to a world filled with love. He changed me. And before I left, I was a good person. I thought that everyone on the team trusted me... But I guess that some people will never see me the way I want them to. To people like Lester, I will always be Helen Cutter's daughter, a psychotic emotionless killer, and someone who is not to be trusted" admitted E, as a single tear fell from her eye.
Unlike she normally did, E made no attempt to wipe away the tear, leaving it to stain her cheek.

"Do not listen to Lester. Do you hear me. Just because he says something, it doesn't make it true" insisted Matt.
"I didn't hear anyone else jumping to my defence, which means that they all think like Lester" replied E.
"No it doesn't. Silence does not mean that you agree with someone. The others all like you-"
"I don't think they do. You're the only one who actually cares about me. The others, apart from Emily, have all dealt with Helen, so they can never completely trust me. You never met Helen, so you don't have that prejudice... But maybe they're right, perhaps I'm more like her than I realise. She had no concern for human life towards the end, and neither do I".

"You are not like your mother. From what I've learned about her, she was an insane woman who wanted to wipe out humanity. You don't want to end the world. You've done everything in your power to save humanity, and stop the Predators from being created. Which makes you very different. Someone who jumps through time rescuing lost humans, is certainly not someone who lacks humanity" reassured Matt.
"Helen wanted to stop the Predators to, but she just had different methods to me... I'm not as good as you think Matt. I have killed a lot of people. And I really would sacrifice all those soldiers who work for General MacNamera, to free my island from Harold Wolf's control. So I guess that makes me a bad person" admitted E.

"I think it just makes you a human actually. We all want to hurt those who have caused us pain. That's just human nature. So it makes sense that you want to kill the people who tortured you. When you turned up looking like you did, I was ready to take them all on, to get revenge on your behalf" revealed Matt.
"You were thinking on the spur of the moment. I don't think that when it came down to it, you could have really killed them" replied E.
"I'm glad that you don't think I would've done it, because I'm not so sure that I would've had the restraint. We all know how protective I am of you"
"That's true. For some reason you think its your mission to protect me from all harm. Though why you would want to protect someone as evil as me, is beyond my comprehension".

"I don't think that you are a bad person E, and I don't want you to think of yourself in such a negative way. Your situation is unique, and being alone in time would turn anybody mad. Danny's brother Patrick certainly went mad. He went on a killing spree" reminded Matt.
"You don't know that I haven't" E said quietly.
"He killed innocents. Have you?" Asked Matt.
"It depends on what you mean by innocents. I didn't kill random people if that's what you mean. Only those who hurt me... But I have been trying to turn over a new leaf. I don't want to be that person anymore".

"The fact that you want to change makes all the difference. Most psychopaths don't want to be good. But you want to change. You want to do the right thing. And I believe that you can change" admitted Matt.
"You've always had faith in me" replied E.
"I have. And looking at you now, I can tell that you aren't the same person I followed through an anomaly, all those months ago. You changed in those months with us"
"I know. But I'm worried that I changed back, in those 6 months I was gone"
"You haven't, trust me".

"Trusting doesn't come naturally to me, as you know. But I do trust you" revealed E.
"And I trust you" admitted Matt.
"Good, because I need you to trust me to do the right thing" replied E.
Matt frowned, "What do you mean?".
"I need to leave. I can't sit in the ARC for the foreseeable future, waiting for news. These past few days have been hell for me, and I can't go through it anymore. Which is why I need to leave"
"No! You are not leaving me again"
"I have to. But don't worry, I am not going to leave this time zone, because I need to wait until my island is safe. I have a place in London, that I sometimes stay at, so I'm going to go there. I'm taking my phone with me, so you can call me when there is news".

"If you aren't going to go travelling in time, then why don't you just stay with me and Emily?" Questioned Matt.
"Because I don't want to. I don't want to ask you for news everytime you come home from work. But I don't want to be at the ARC right now. I need some time away from you all. And I am going go throw myself into my own work to distract me while I wait. But you can ring me as often as you like, since you are the one paying for the phone" admitted E.
"But I don't want you to go away again"
"I know you don't, but this is something I have to do. And if you want me to come back, you will have to force Lester to get a move on and free my island. Then when it's done you can tell me, and I'll come back so that we can go to my island together and free the creatures. But until then, I want to be alone".