"Awwwww look at him he's so adorable!!" One of the many visitors said to my baby brother. They always seemed to love him more than me. I was eventually very very sad for my young age, I would be forgotten most of the time while people paid attention to my brother I would sit in the corner and listen to there conversations. No one really bothered to talk to me anymore, so I was usually alone, the other kids didn't play with me because I was too quiet. And I always felt it was my fault when things a went bad, one I took a bowl of Mac and cheese and I got trouble. When people got drunk they would yell at me. Anyways my family decided to go swimming and I went with them, when we got there... I didn't know how to swim. So while everyone else was playing with each having fun and crap I saw my chance to end my life so I walked towards the deep end of the pool (I didn't know how to read numbers back then) when I got to the deep end I thought well go head and jump, so I did. Then as I started sinking deeper and deeper I felt someone grab me and pull up to the surface, it was a black man who saved me from drowning. Once I was out of the water I laid on the ground and started crying (because my plan had failed) as my family was still swimming around in the water, I could hear laughter,water splashing and children giggling. I told the man thank you without trying to stutter too much then he left, and soon after that me and my family also left. I told them that i almost drowned and they didn't seem to care, my cousins were playing their video games,my aunt was looking at a magazine,and the kids were playing tag. So I went to the corner and went to sleep.
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Ok that was the first time I tried to drown myself.
In the next chapter you will find out about my other failed suicide.
