————————————————————— | REAL LIFE | —————————————————————
SIMON DOESN'T KNOW WHY HE suddenly decided against every thought of common sense that his brain should have been providing, he doesn't know why he drove to the store to buy her favourite ice cream and he certainly doesn't know why he thought it had been a good idea to show up at her door with said sweet.In all honesty, he doesn't have that much to lose —— his minds obviously already kicked the bucket, so perhaps that's why he finds himself sharing a tub of cookies and cream ice cream with Carina Campbell in her living room.
It was just as easy to slip into old habits as it had been the other week, the two sitting criss-cross on either sides of the couch, their backs leaning against the plush arm rest to stop themselves from falling backwards. there hadn't been a moment of silence since he had entered the apartment —— and while he knew that carina despised awkward silences and delt with that hatred by talking rapidly, simon couldn't help but focus on how he hadn't felt at ease for a long time, that he hadn't been able to just sit and watch on with such content as someone rambled about the strangest things in what felt like years.
Simon had not been expecting to be laughing alongside someone who he had tried for so long to forget, someone who he never imagined wanting to have a conversation with ever again —— it was an odd sensation that he found himself never wanting to let go of.
Carina had been the one to take reign of majority of the conversation, and it allowed the man with dyed hair to watch as her eyes lit up with glee and how there always seemed to be a smile pulling at the corner of her mouth, he noticed that she still scrunched up her nose whenever she changed topics to something that she had little to no fondness for, or how she continuously tried to crack her knuckles even though they had already popped.
The woman doesn't like how easy it is for her and simon to talk like normal humans —— actually they weren't talking like normal humans, because normal people would never have even placed themselves into this position, normal people don't just uproot their entire lives and cut all communication with those they considered friends because they simply couldn't handle it.
It takes an hour and a half for the conversation to dwindle into almost nothing, but even with an surrounding air of unsureness it feels comfortable, just like old times.
"do you remember the first time we went bowling?" simon asks as he places the empty tub and plastic spoons into the waste bin, the question made Carina recoil slightly, not having expected him to ask such a question, but rather the one she knew he desperately wanted the answer to.
"the first time?" she queries, leaning over the couch and resting her elbows on the neck rest, watching as he stood a few meters away with a smile.
"in London, must have been about four years ago now, the alley with the crazy flashing lights"
Carina nodded as he spoke, indeed remembering the bowling trip that she had been invited on all those years ago —— its the second time she has had to remember it in as many weeks, it must have been something about that outing that was a focal point.
"oh yeah," she chuckles, smiling softly at the memories. "didn't someone break a light there?"
"yeah, I'm sure it was cal —— but I distinctly remember you trying to break my leg" carina gasps loudly, the sound echoing through the open planned room, before it quickly turned into a laugh.
"you had scared the shit out of me" she argues weakly, pointing a finger tauntingly in his direction.
"that's no excuse" he scoffs, walking back to the couch and gracefully throwing himself onto the right cushion —— closer than he had been sitting before, and carina had noticed the small distance that was between them almost immediately.
"that's like being accused of murder and saying that the other person walked into the knife!" he exclaims, placing an arm around the back of the couch.
"i think murder and me lightly kicking you are two vastly different things"
"if you look at it that way...i suppose"
he is leaning foward now, whether on purpose or not is unknown, but so is she, and it feels so natural that carina doesn't want to move back, she doesn't want it to go back —— back to not knowing one another, not talking.
so when he asks if he can kiss her...well, she ignores how quick she is to drown out the low volume of the tv, ignores how quick she is to place her hands losely around his neck, how quick she is to forget that less than two hours ago she had been solely focused on writting down the lyrics to express the feelings she tries so hard to keep silent within her head and her heart everyday. Finding a peaceful bliss from someone she never believed she would ever see again was a confronting thought, and it was one that she would place on the backburner for the time being, because as she scoots herself closer to simon, she feels the world melting away.
it's true what people say —— that old habits are the hardest ones to break, but carina is slightly hopeful that certain activities, ( the very one that reminds her of the times ) is not one that ends anytime soon.
