Cowgirls Don't Cry

Chapter One

It was Monday when it happened, MOM!

Today school was out for the houston rodeo. My mom was a famous baral racer. Her number was 14 and it was almost time for her to perform.

As the speaker, and owner of the outside arena. He spoke, now today we have a famous girl here to amaze us. Cameron and her palomino, Sam.

The gates opened and they came running out. She was doing amazing. Dad and I were sitting on the rail. When mom got to the third and last barrel, everything went wrong.

Everything happened so quickly Sam had fallen on her, she wasn't moving, mom or Dad. Was it the end? The worst immediately came to my mind. 

The paramedic ran to them, and Dad had helped get Sam off of her, my Dad told me to stay on the railing then he came back to me and told me to go to the truck. He said he would meet me there.

I got in the red truck hailing a medium sized horse trailer and sat in the passenger seat crying, what was going to happen, I think as I cried.

I saw a helicopter land, in the field close to the area and they had gotten mom and a vet had gotten Sam. Thay had rushed her to the hospital. Dad came back running for his life, and quickly started the truck leaving.

We were speeding to the hospital, with the trucks emergency lights on, I was scared for my Mom.

We had beaten the helicopter to the hospital and they had rushed mom in unconscious.
We had been there for five hours. It was  twelve already and they haven't told us anything. I've cried myself to sleep that night. Dad had told me that Sam was ok. There were two rooks in the dirt that made them trip. The one that had coursed the fall, and the one that Sam's head had hit.

At least it wasn't mom who hit the Rock I think to myself. After ten minutes the doctor came in and said that mom had died. After that Dad woke me up and told me the horrific news. I had a complete breakdown. 

We left the hospital and headed home. The drive was long. When we got on the second highway, I fell asleep again.

Hitting a bump in the road I woke up, knowing we were close to being home, we were heading down that old dirt road that Mom and I always rode on.

Sam comes home in a couple of days and tomorrow we will have to plan a funeral, I didn't want to but, I know mom would want me to be there, and I hate myself for not wanting to go, but I'm to emotionally tired to do anything.

We pulled in and unhooked the trailer.
We went in and Dad made a quick plate of food for us to eat, we haven't eaten all day, my stomach feels sick trying to digest the overcooked foods.

Eating was hard to do right now, because of all of my emotions right now. I was mad at Sam for not leading on her legs like she was trained, I was mad at the people for not checking for Rocks in the dirt in the first place, but there was nothing anyone could have done.

More importantly I was mad at the doctor for not helping. Tomorrow will be a long hard day of work.

Tomorrow morning
It was finally Saturday and we were getting ready to leave, hearing a knock on the door. Dad opened it and it was some guy. Hearing them talk the guy said, I have a horse that no one wants, she is an absolute sweetheart. You can have her for free, I think she would be perfect for your daughter.

My Dad said ok, thank you we will think about it today we can't take her in. we are busy, I'll get back with you on the offer later.

We had gotten to town at three and had planned for Moms funeral, we are getting a black with brown tented coffin with a white horse on it. It was beautiful. Mom who would have loved it. If she could've seen it, I told myself she could and that she was happy about the coffin.

We had the signature book a picture of her riding Sam, and the little booklet a picture of her in her club jacket. The background was an old western cabin.

After all the planning we went and had gotten something to eat at wendy's. 

Tomorrow we will be finishing everything else, I hope this is all going to be ok in the end.

We are now heading home to rest for tomorrow, the funeral. It's going to be an open casket so I'm going to suffer.

Walking in the house, I change into something less fitted and more comfortable, to sleep in.

Brushing my teeth and crawling into bed, raping myself in my blue sheets and soft blankets.

After a while of tossing and turning I found a spot I'm comfortable in and I slowly started to fall asleep with my arm underneath my head and my other tossed out in front of me.

I miss you mom and it's only been a day now, I love horses, but now I'm scared to ride, I want to have fun, feel free with the horses let my mind go blank of my surroundings only me and my horse.

If I even get over my fears and, ride this new horse, I hope we get it. I would ride Sam, but I feel like this is a sign of retirement she was getting old and soon she can rest with Mother by her side.

That was my last thought before falling to sleep.

It was the next morning and I took a shower, and dressed up all fancy, but still casual. I had on a pair of blue jeans, a light blue hoodie and under it my black shirt. Trying to figure out what boots I should wear. I'll go with my light blue boots. ( The ones one the book cover )

I look at myself in the mirror, wow I say to myself. I'm absolutely stunning if Mom was her to she me right now she would mealt in tears of joy. She always loved to see me dressed up like this.

We ate breakfast then went to the truck, heading to the church.

This is going to be rough.