Not You | JENNIE

Third Of December

"No, you'll get sick" I handed her, her sweater back but she was persistent- I love that about her but it can get a bit annoying, she has a thing for bickering with people.

"I don't care just put it on it looks better on you than it does on me"

"Not true but fine I'll wear it" she wraps her sweater, soft white, and polyester,  around me. It wasn't freezing but it was still cold outside. I was rushing over here before she left, I didn't grab a jacket.

"So what did you buy" she tried reaching for my bad but I lift it above my head making her get closer to me reaching for it. She lost balance and I held her waist. Those 5 seconds felt like hours, have you heard of the phrase getting lost in someone's eyes- didn't believe it sounded stupid when someone said it but here those 5 seconds took me to the middle of the Tongass Forest.
As I looked into her beautiful cat eye, a flash of hope hit me. I love you, Jennie Kim.

///

"Come on, I want to know" she whined and started to pout. Such a child. She knows that it gets me every time so pulled one out of the two boxes I had-she can't see the other one.

"That's a cute music box but you were in the store for a while and that's all you brought?" well, it's not my fault you took an hour picking out the vinyl you wanted- I also didn't have to come so early to wait for you but whatever.

"Each box is different and they all play a song a certain way, I have to find the right one before I choose" she laughs showing off her gummy smile. She had a smile that makes the world around us brighter than the sunrise. My sun, moon, and anything I need to live, that's what Jennie was for me. I just wish I could be everything for her too.

"If you say so" She laughed it off and as we continued walking I watched her- I'm always watching her but this time I'm observing closely. I could see that she was cold but if I wanted to give it back she would keep insisting that I wear her sweater. Why would she care so much if I get sick? I love that she worries but I wouldn't even call us close friends like that. I only met her by accident-okay fine I've liked Jennie since freshman year, she was just so pretty and everyone liked or at least envied her.

I had overheard her talking with one of her friends in the locker room about how she was looking for some vinyl records for her new record player. I went looking for some near her area and I was gonna somehow find a way to recommend it to her but she found it all on her own. I still visited the store, I liked someone the records they had here and at times I would come on my own accord and she would come too.

After four long months, I gain the courage to
"accidentally" dropped something right in front of her which happened to be the same book she was holding- they sold books and instruments here too, they had everything. The book was nothing too memorable in my opinion- I only read the back but at least I didn't judge the cover. We talked- well she talked but I didn't mind, I loved the way her eyes lit up as she talked about the book and its author. The sparkle in her was unforgettable, she was unforgettable.

"So this is where we split" We reached the final light, I took off the sweater and handed it to her but she shook her head and wrapped it around me once again. She winked and started to lean in, the panic I felt that that moment felt unreal. I felt like fainting on the spot but she passed my lips stopping by my ear, I closed my eyes as I felt her warm breath gently tickle my cheek.

"Like I said it looks better on you than it does me" she pulled back and then walked away while I stood still in shock. My mind went all over the place but the loudest thought was that I was about to have my first kiss at 17 with the girl I like for 4 years. I know what you think 17 really why wait so long? Well to get a kiss you need to be likable enough to even get someone to think about kissing which is something I am not- tho Lisa did say if my childhood fantasy with Jennie never came true she would be willing to kiss me- but no it's okay my childhood isn't over yet. I have a few months before then.