One-sided Ache (short story)

Her Side

Her Side

"Hindi kita gusto."

Ilang beses rejections ang matatanggap natin bago tayo kayang mahalin ng taong minamahal natin? Hanggang ilang kabiguan matuto nila tayong mahalan? Despite all the pains we encounter because of rejection, why do we still hold on to that little hope that they will return our feelings?

I just smiled at him kahit sa totoo ay unti-unti ako pinapatay. Ilan beses na ba akong namamtay dahil sa pagkabigo sa pag-ibig? Hindi ko alam.

It hurts how the person you love look at you like a desperate girl, which I am right now, begging for their attention. Ang gusto ko lang naman ay maramdaman ang pagmamahal niya.

But the thing there is, love is never bought. No. That wont be love. It is nurtured and is given to you by the person who trully devoted themselves to you.

Tumalikod na siya at umalis. Napatingin ako kay West na kanina pa sa tabi ko. My bestfriend who always will be there to hold me if I feel like breaking down.

I smiled at him, "Tara na, West, tapos na ang trabaho ko dito." I laugh and tried to should nonchalant. Tumawa din siya kaya napatanto kong sanay na siya sa kadramahan ko kay Easton Fortes.

"Oo nga, soon enough, mapapansin kana nun, Gianna." He smiled at me, looking hopeful. Sama nga mapansin niya na ako. Sana nga.

Ngumuso ako, "Sabihin mo nga sa pesteng kuya mo na mahal na mahal ko, i-i love you too din ako." I meant in for a joke but it sounds like reality speaking to me. Reality telling me that he didn't return my affection and I still have to beg for it. Pathetic.

Napailing lang siya at nagpatuloy sa paglakad. Napabuntong-hininga ako ng patago. Sometimes I wonder kung bakit tayo nahuhulog sa taong hindi tayo kayang saluhin. Ang taong hindi tayo kayang mahalin. I smiled bitterly. This one sided love is killing me slowly. And this is a one sided ache I shared alone.

The ache that will never fade unless he loves me back. Or I find new love.