Riordanverse OCs One Shots

Crashing a funeral

I hated being at my own funeral. I probably shouldn't have gone, but my own curiosity won over. What I saw made me regret my slightly impulsive decisions.

Firstly, it was in a church, which was strange as no one in my family was Christian. My American family members had flown over to the UK to see me. I stayed out of their way, sulked in the shadows. I watched as my own body was carried in.

Now, you may be wondering how I'm telling this story if I'm dead. You might think I faked my own death. But let me tell you, that's not the case. I am 100% irreversibly dead. 

You see, a few days prior to the funeral, I was in school, living a normal life. We were halfway through PE when the fire alarm went off. No big deal; we were outside anyway. Then I saw it.

Towering over the building was a 50 foot giant. His skin was a dark red and his beady eyes resembled lumps of coal. He was the one lighting the school on fire. So I did what any normal kid would do, I charged towards him.

I grabbed a bag of javelins we were using. They were real ones that were normally reserved for the 6th formers. I ignored the shouts of "Gavinson, what are you doing?" and ran into the building.

I located the giant's stomach on the top floor, near Maths. I took a few steps back and flinged a javelin as hard as I could into it. It sunk in the spongy flesh. The giant staggered back. He probably squashed a few of the teacher's cars. He howled in pain.

I saw his massive face fill up the corridor. He smelled like burnt rotten meat. I had to stop myself from retching. I aimed another up his enormous nostril. Compared to it, it looked like a toothpick.

"Ow!" the giant yelled. His eyes turned to me. It felt like my senses were on fire. I lifted up another javelin. That's when I became aware of the smoke.

All around me, the corridor was burning. How long had I been breathing it in for? I started to cough. And cough. The smoke was filling my lungs. I threw another javelin but it just landed on the ground. I had my land limply wrapped around the final javelin and then I passed out.

When I woke up, I found my lungs filled with fresh air. I survived, I thought.I checked my clothes. Not charred any anyway. My arms were free of burn marks

I was outside some building. When I looked up, it gave me vertigo. I couldn't even see the top floor. I looked at the large oaken doors that led into the building. "Well then, I guess there's only one place to go." I walked in.

It looked like a lobby. A large hairy man that resembled a viking was at the front desk. The floor was covered in animal furs. I stepped gingerly around them. "Excuse me," I piped to the man "Where am I?"

The man looked up and grunted. He rolled his eyes and gestured to a card on the desk. It read "Hotel Valhalla". Valhalla. I'd heard about that place when we did the Vikings at school. Being from York, you kind of have to learn about them. I knew it was like Viking heaven. But if I'm in heaven then...no, I couldn't be, that's ridiculous. I moved my hand to my wrist. I could feel a pulse. Phew.

The man at the desk called "Hunding!" and an equally viking-y looking guy walked over. His face looked like it was smashed in and he needed to trim that beard.

"Well then, a new one!" he seemed cheery enough "Come on, I'll take you to your room!"

He led me to a lift and we rode up while That's Life by Frank Sinatra played in a language I didn't recognise.

We stopped at the 21st floor. "Here we are!" Hunding said. He ushered me along the corridor. I saw people outside playing Uno. Then, one shouted "Uno! Miss a turn! Off!" and proceeded to shoot the other guy in the face. I was so taken aback. I had to stop.