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7:56pm
What the fuck is she doing here?
As soon as I opened the door I closed it. I forgot to lock it and as I walked away she walked right in. I groaned at her persistence.
"Get out of my house Beyoncé"
"I'm not leaving until we talk" she stated firmly. I knew this was going to be a long night. I picked up my phone and went upstairs to my bedroom with her hot on my heels. I really didn't want to see her and truthfully I was fighting off tears. I looked behind me and rolled my eyes once I saw how close she was. I could smell her and she always smelled so good. She had dressed down from what she had on earlier today and I wished she hadn't. I was tempted to push her off the stairs because of how good she looked.
Turning into my room, I threw my phone at my pillow and went into the bathroom. I locked the door before she could get in and started my shower.
"Unlock the door love" she said sweetly.
"Go away Beyoncé" I groaned. She was so fucking persistent I wanted to rip her head off. I turned off my shower and realized I forgot a towel.
"Fuck" I said just a little too loud.
"Someone forgot a towel?" She said failing to hide the enthusiasm in her voice.
I'm just gonna have to walk out, it's my house anyway
I snatched the door open and walked straight to my closet. Grabbing a towel to dry myself off I could feel her eyes on me.
"Find some business Beyoncé" I said clearly annoyed.
"This.. is exactly where I'm supposed to be. Why won't you talk to me?"
"Because you're a selfish bitch" I slipped on a t-shirt and pair of Calvin Kline boxers after I applied lotion generously to myself and walked out to finish my hair. What was supposed to be a quick trip to the bathroom ended at the closet door way.
"Get out of the way" My eyes were threatening to spew tears that would fill the tub in minutes. I knew it was over when the first one dropped.
"I want you to talk to me Nicki"
"Leave me alone, and would you move?" I asked in a smaller voice. She lifter her hand to my chin and pulled my head up. As soon as my eyes met hers the tears poured from my eyes like a waterfall.
She frowned at me and used the pad of her thumb to wipe my tears. I snatched her hand away and pusher her from the door way. she picked me up and threw me on the bed all the whole flipping me over in the process. I turned my head to look out the window as I watched the rain fall.
"Onika look at me" she said turning my head to meet her once more.
"I love you, please let me explain" I tired to get out of her grasp but she had my arms pinned.
More tears fell.
She kissed my forehead and pulled me up so I was straddling her.
"Are you going to let me explain?" She asked. Her voice was much more quiet and she was on the verge of crying. That peaked my interest.
"Why are you crying?"
"Because I fucked up. I see how much I've hurt you in your eyes and made you cry three times today. You don't deserve me but I need to explain, will you let me?" I was silent. She took that as her chance. She explained everything, about how she got caught up and bullshit here and there but then she said something that stood out to me.
"I knew what I was doing was wrong, when I tried to end it she threatened to black mail me. That's no excuse but she had taken pictures of you and I and-" I stopped listening. Pictures of her and I. I think she noticed I zoned out so she tapped my shoulder.
"Here, this is all of them. All the other evidence has been destroyed and she signed a lengthy contract. She won't be problem to you anymore or me for that matter."
I looked down. At the photos, it was of our most intimate moments. I cried at the thought of these getting out. I hated people in my business and she did too. She started again.
"I didn't have sex with her, not one time. She ate me out and that was it. I just got my test results back from the clinic. That doesn't prove my statement but, I though it might wanna being you piece of mind. I'm truly sorry for the hurt I've caused you. I know you don't wanna take me back and that's okay. But I've decided that you are my forever, so I'll wait and do whatever it takes to have you in my arms. Permanently."
I was frozen, I knew she was telling the truth. She looked at me the entire time even though I wasn't looking at her. I felt her eyes on me. Truthfully I've already forgiven her, I love her too fucking much. I believe in second chances but I wasn't ready.
"I love you" I spoke softly.
She held my head in the palms of her hands.
" I love you more than words can describe. I was foolish to think you weren't for me and it will never happen again"
"You were pretty foolish.." I murmured. She chuckled.
"I just want another chance. But I'm not rushing you. What do you say?"
I genuinely thought about it. My heart was already saying yes and I was too.
"Okay"
"Okay?"
"Okay." She kissed my lips quickly and pulled me into a hug. We spent the rest of the day enjoying each other's company and talking about more feelings and such.
I knew that I had made the right decision when she expertly held me through the night and was glad I had chosen to leave the house today.
