Harry Potter and Addams Family

year 1

There was a large puff of smoke on Platform 9 and ¾. It smelled like lavender with a hint of locker room socks.

"Bless me, I haven't done that in a while."

"Cool! Let's do it again!"

"On the way back, darling. I'll let you hold the foot."

The smoke cleared. Adderworth Bulstrode blinked in disbelief.

It couldn't be. It couldn't be That Family.

But there was no way it wasn't. No one normal looked like They did.

There was a woman holding a mustachioed baby, her face shaded by a veil and further shadowed by a black lace umbrella, standing stoically in the midst of the motley crew that surrounded her. It included a madly-grinning man puffing on a monster of a cigar, a giant that wouldn't have looked out of place in a morgue, a wizened old crone that put storybook witches to shame, a muscled strawberry-blond with what looked like a crossbow, a young woman with her face hidden behind her fringe and Chinese fan, and a little girl with a beheaded doll.

And a hand that didn't look like it belonged to anybody. There was a hand, all by itself, tapping its fingers idly and looking as bored as a dismembered body part could.

There was also luggage, as if someone from That Family was going to Hogwarts.

Oh no.

"Who are they, Father?"

"Hush, Millicent!" he hissed, his mind unfurling in cold horror.

It couldn't be. Not Them.

-.-.-.-...-.-.-.-

Syrena Zabini dabbed at her eyes as she watched her son push his luggage onto the train.

"Don't cry, Mother. It's just until the holidays."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I just..." She smiled tearfully at him. "Who's going to help me hide the bodies now?"

"Technically I shouldn't know about things like that."

"Yes, yes." Syrena sniffed, waving her handkerchief. "But I shall miss you so, my dear. I'll have a new husband by the time you get back, don't you worry."

"An unplanned romance, I'm sure." Blaise smirked sardonically. Something made his nose twitch and he looked around curiously. "What is that smell?"

His mother fluttered her eyelashes as she looked around. "What are you - Oh, my gods!"

"What's the matter?" Blaise blinked as the piteous look on his mother's face was replaced with something close to giddy awe. "Do you know those people?"

"Those are Addams!" She said breathily, yellow-tinted eyes wide. "Oh, Blaise darling, the stories! They haven't been seen on the Isles for over a hundred and eighty years, but I'd know them anywhere!"

"What on earth are you talking about, Mother? Who are the Addams?"

"Oh, my darling. You'll soon find out. You're so lucky!"

-.-.-.-...-.-.-.-

"Lucius Malfoy, old man!"

"What -"

Lucius Malfoy was not a man given to surprise. But when a strange man gripped his hand with the strength of a stampeding bull, he supposed that he could be surprised just this once.

"Gomez Addams! We met a few years ago, June I think it was, in Oregon. There was an explosion?"

"Ah, yes." How could he forget? The carnage had been dreadful.