glowing. || julian devorak

part two.

"You made it!" James exclaimed with bright eyes, watching as Julian's tall figure rounded the path through the palace gardens. She had to tilt her head up as he drew closer, bringing up a hand to block out the sun. "I was beginning to think you'd ditched me."

Heat raced up Julian's neck, tinting his ears pink. He tried to regulate his breathing to cool himself down, but that only brought attention to the prickling feeling in his lungs. "Ah, never. A guy'd have to be crazy to stand you up."

James beamed, and she grabbed Julian's wrist, pulling until he toppled down beside her. Usually, she preferred to sit on the edge of the fountain, but she'd dragged Julian onto the ground a few feet away from the marble fixture. As he arranged himself into a crisis-cross position beside her, dusting himself off, he studied her — the way the light broke into pieces against her face, shattered by the leaves above them, the way her legs stretched out I front of her, her toes and fingers digging into the muddy ground. The earth stained the sheer layers of fabric that made up her gauzy skirt, but even the dirt couldn't dull the ring glinting on her left hand.

James let out a groan, following Julian's gaze. "Nadia's gonna kill me, I know," she laughed. "Stars know how long this damn thing took to make. Probably should've gone with pants today." She looked back up at him, voice soft. "What's with the face? Come on, don't think I haven't noticed you avoiding me."

His heart sped up. He'd barely said two words to James since the engagement, opting to keep himself locked up in his house, screaming and crying and choking as the pile of petals on his bedroom floor grew larger. Unnaturally golden, some tipped in violet, all glowing softly in the dark of his house. More beautiful than anything he'd seen in all his travels, save for the watery blood that splattered each flower.

"Have you been feeling okay? Every time I see you lately, you look thinner." Her eyebrows knit, a deep crease forming at the center of her forehead. "You're always welcome at the shop for dinner, or here at the palace. And I know Portia's more than happy to have you at the cottage."

He tried not to flinch away from her as she brought a hand up to his face. "And have you been sleeping? Your eyes are bloodshot." She brushed her thumb in a soft arc above his cheekbone. "And you have dark circles again. Honestly, Jules, I'm getting worried."

"Don't be," Julian answered hurriedly. "I just haven't been feeling tip-top. It's flu season, you know."

James raised an incredulous eyebrow. "It's not, but alright, Doctor Devorak. Listen, Julian..." She trailed off uncertainly, like she wasn't sure if she ought to continue. "I just — I know we haven't been talking as much lately, and I'm sorry. I know it's on me." Her hand had come to rest on the curve of his shoulders, thumbing idly at the leather collar. "After everything that happened with Lucio, we stopped spending as much time together, and I know it's because I moved back into the shop. I really am sorry, Jules. I thought, well..." She looked down, fiddling with her hands. "I've been thinking... Asra would like to keep some traditions in the ceremony—"

Ceremony. The word shot through Julian like a lightning strike. He'd nearly forgotten, so caught up in the joyful normality of just listening to James's voice.

"—and he's asking Muriel to stand beside him at the altar. And... I know we haven't known each other nearly as long as they have, and I know you might not want to, but you're my closest friend. Do you think you'd like to stand up with me?" She couldn't keep eye contact with him, breaking her gaze every other word to stare at the sky or the grass or the water.

Julian opened his mouth to respond, to ease her nerves, and... nothing. Absolutely nothing. He couldn't find the words, didn't trust himself to say anything without being overtaken by a coughing fit.

James's eyes widened before promptly filling with tears. She looked away from him yet again, laughing sharply and brining her hands to her face. "Oh. Of course." She wiped her eyes quickly. "Yeah, just forget I asked. It was a dumb idea anyway, I shouldn't have even asked that of you." Her voice broke on the last few words, and she moved to stand back up. "Stars, I'm sorry. This was a bad idea, inviting you over. I-I'm just gonna head back to the library. I'm... I'm sorry, Julian."

And she left.

Julian watched her rush back into the palace, not missing the way her body seemed to crumple in on itself the farther away she got. He wanted so, so badly to follow her, to tell her he'd do whatever she asked of him, no matter the personal cost. He would do anything if it made her happy. But his mouth filled, blood mixed with flora, and he couldn't call out to her.