Strange Eyes

CHAPTER 3

Bahay

Dumiretso agad ako sa kwarto pagdating namin sa bahay.

I changed my clothes and wore something comfortable. An oversized shirt paired with denim shorts.

Humiga agad ako sa kama tapos kinuha ang aking phone sa side table. Nag log in ako sa facebook account ko at hindi na nagulat sa maraming messages at notifications.

Binuksan ko ang aking mga natanggap na mga mensahe, karamihan ay sa mga groupchats na kasali ako. Minsan hindi ko din naiintindihan ang mga taong nag aaksaya ng oras i-add ako, alam ko namang alam nila na wala akong oras para makisali sa mga pinag uusapan nila.

Minsan tina-tag din ako sa mga post, specifically group picture, kahit wala ako sa litrato.

Nag log out nalang ako, wala namang magandang scoop sa facebook.

Napatulala ako sa kisame, at napabuga ng hangin.

They call me anti-social, well they can call me what they want.

I'd been keeping myself away from the crowds, because for me crowd means betrayal. We trust easily, that's why we easily get hurt too. In order to stop this things from happening, in order to stop yourself from hurting, you better distance yourself.

I have trust issues, and I'm still finding my escape route.

Mom said that healing takes time, that's why I am taking every single bit of my time.

Dad said small steps are considered as achievements, and I do believe him.

Ash said they're always there for me , no matter what happen, we are bound to have each other.

And that is why I trust them.

Napalingon ako sa pinto nang bigla itong bumukas at pumasok si Ash

"What?" I asked him.

"Someone's looking for you downstairs sis" he said and flashed a playful smile.

Ano na namang kalokohan to?

"Sino raw siya?" tanong ko sa kanya.

"See it for yourself" sabi niya at agad na lumabas ng kwarto ko.

I lazily stood up and then checked myself in the mirror.

Ang dami ng kawirdohan na nangyayari sa buhay ko ah! Hindi na ako natutuwa.

Pagkababa ko, nagulat ako sa taong naghahanap sa'kin.

"Anong ginagawa mo dito?" tanong ko sa kaniya.

"Can we talk"

"Tara sa labas tayo" lumakad ako papalabas habang siya ay nakasunod sa akin.

Nagbeep ang phone ko.

Lil Bro : I am watching you.

Hindi ko mapiligang matawa sa aking nabasa, puro kalokohan talaga 'tong bunso namin.

Me to Ash : I am watching u too.

Pagkatapos kong mag reply ibinulsa ko ang aking cellphone at umupo sa swing.

"Anong pag uusapan natin?, as far as I remember we're strangers. " walang ganang sabi ko sa kanya.

"I know it's weird that I came to your house, , I know you'd feel uncomfortable being here with me---" I cut him out.

"Are you perhaps , stalking me?" hindi makapaniwalang tanong ko sakanya.

"What? are you accusing me?" he replied.

"Then why are you here? Barging in someone's house?"

" I'm here because you dropped your necklace in the church earlier." he said with calmness.

I was shocked by the next words he said. Kinapa ko ang aking leeg at wala nga doon ang kwintas.

As soon as I lifted my eyes to him, he's already staring at me ,and for the second time around, I was again drown   by the eyes that screams lots of things.

Napalunok ako ng wala sa oras

Emotions...

Untold stories...

And then I came to a realization, that my eyes and his eyes expresses the same feelings, the same difficulties, and one thing's  for sure, our condition is critical.

Natauhan ako ng hawakan niya ang kamay ko at inilagay ang kwintas sa aking palad.

I bit my lower lip, because I felt ashamed of myself.

How can I jump into conclusions without even consulting his reasons.

Am I adopting the traits and attitudes of the people around my world? Did I also became toxic?

"I'm sorry underistimating your intentions Dexter, I am really sorry" I said in the lowest voice I could make.

Nakakahiya!

"Your sorry is not enough" he said in a baritone voice.

Agad nanlaki ang mata ko sa gulat.

What does he want? Is he going to get my other lung? Or my kidney , or what about my  eyes, maybe---

"I know what you're thinking, I'm not going to get your kidney, even your eyes, what I'm going to get is your ----heart" he said and then he laughed.

I rolled my eyes..

"Corny" tanging nasabi ko.

"Anyways, thank you for giving me the necklace, and by the way how did you know that this is where I live?" tanong ko sakanya.

"Of course, I asked , sa mga nakakakilala sa inyo. " sagot niya.

"Seryoso ka? " di makapaniwalang tanong ko.

"Oo, why?"

Umiling ako "Ah , wala"

"I honestly want us to be friends Alliyah" he said out of nowhere.

Friends? Does that word even exist? 

And then suddenly a memory came up into my mind.

"Friends may betray you Alli, but somehow in the midst of  life's difficulties, we cannot erase the fact that we need friends, we need life companions , aside from having parents whom you can count on, sibling whom you can trust, we need friends to add sweetness into our life. Always remember that the word  "friend" is the alternative word for "family" . When your family is out of reach, you can call a friend to save you and to be with you. But making friends needs time Alli, you have to know him/her better, so that you could decide whether to invest your  trust or not. " Mom said .

I wiped my tears and smiled a bit.

"I understand you, of course who woudn't right? I know it's hard, but I hope that you'll overcome it, as your Doctor and as your Mom, I advice you to keep yourself away from other people , temporarily. And when the time comes that you're ready, grab the opportunity, because dear..you deserve to be happy." Mom kissed my forehead after comforting me by her words.

And maybe, just maybe this is the key to my happiness.

"Sure, so Friends?" I extended my hand to him, so that we could both do the "shake hands " thing.

And gladly, he accepted it " There's no turning back, Hi my friend" then he smiled , a genuine one.