Bob looked at Raymond in confusion. "Uhhh. What do you mean? Whatya talkin bout?" Bob asked in confusion. Raymond chewed it slower as if he's inspecting it. "I dunno...It tastes funny..." Bob looked around in confusion as Raymond kept chewing slowly. "huh....hmmm." Bob looked almost as confused as Raymond. and then Bob sat back up straight and crossed his arms "ohhh! oh yeah yeah yeah." he giggled "Yeah yeah,that's because i put...drugs in it." Bob said proudly.
"W-what?!" Raymond said worryingly. "why?!?" he asked loudly this time. Raymond then let out a sigh as he facepalmed himself. "What's wrong with you?!" Raymond said again.Of all the years knowing Bob he should already know not to question these things cause Bob always gives a dumb response. "o-oh d-dude u-uh i'm sorry-" Bob stuttered while his hands behind his back and his head tilted in shame. "I thought-" But Bob was soon interrupted by Raymond,who was now getting loud. "No no no.You thought wrong! i mean,what did you put in these starbursts anyway?" Raymond asked angrily and nervous towards Bob. "it's just a little weed!"Bob exclaimed "it-it's just a little weed." He said again more calmly. "Come on." Raymond started. "You put weed in the candy pieces-" Raymond asked firmly as he's slouching over the counter in a feminine manner facing Bob.
Bob stared to the side for a bit and snapped his fingers. "Oh- oh no wait!" Bob giggled "No no,i remember now,don't worry dude,i didn't put weed in the candy pieces!" Bob said happily as Raymond looked more relieved "Oh thank god..." Raymond sighed. "No,it was Acid!" Raymond's eyes widened and he stood up straight and spit out all the candy. "whAT?!"
Raymond asked in a surprised and nervous manner. "Acid!? What the f*ck is wrong with you?!?!" Raymond looked nervously at Bob dead in the eye. "I'm- i'm sorry." Bob said with an ashamed face. "i mean you said that like...acid is safer than weed." Raymond explained loudly. "You know it's not,right?" Raymond said with a rather annoyed expression on his face.Bob then took a small breath and said quietly "yes..." for his feelings were kinda hurt by being yelled at."y-yeah...yeah i know...S-sorry i uh...dunno why i said that-" Bob said while standing awkwardly. Raymond then let out a loud groan with his face in his hands now slouching over the counter again.
"I've never done acid before! I didn't WANT to do acid!" Raymond said while slamming his hands down onto the wooden counter. "But even if i did,i'd much rather be told about it then slipped some...stupid starburst!" Bob looked like he was about to cry in regret. "L-look,i'm sorry,okay?I really am.But what's done is done,i advice...at this point...just calm down and enjoy it.Y'know what i mean? Seriously,man..." Bob then said in an annoying sounding voice "it's too late!"
Raymond then let out a sigh. "i guess you're right..." Raymond looked sad while still slouching over the counter in,again,a feminine manner. "well..." Bob looked away for a second until he heard a loud metal clinking sound. "when these s'posed to kick in?" Raymond asked. But Bob hesitantly answered for his face was in awe of what he was seeing,then answered "Right f*cking now!" "what?" Raymond question what Bob was trying to say.Until Bob said "Broooo... look in the window!" Raymond turned and saw...himself?
Well,to put it straight forward,Raymond turned into a Gumball machine.Except his glasses and cat ears and tail still remained on him. "what the f****ck, ugghhh this is crazy..." Raymond said disappointingly.Bob was still staring at Gumball machine Raymond in awe. "Come on,that's not me." Raymond said to Bob calmly. "that's NOT me." he said again trying to sound more convincing,but Bob was still staring in total disbelief.Then after a few seconds of silence,Gumball Raymond said "If this crap f*cks up my brain i'm gonna kill you,man." in a angrier tone.
Bob then let out a loud laugh at Raymond. Raymond sighed. "This...this is stupid!" Raymond still sounding quiet since they were both still tired since it was currently 2 in the morning. "I'm a gumball machine." Raymond now examining himself. "Come on,it's supposed to be fun." Raymond then gave Bob the 'o rly?' look and said "This?!" he then turned the coin wench on his chest a few times.and then a gumball fell and Raymond picked it out of his flap and put it in his mouth,chewed a few times and swallowed. "Not fun,man." Gumball Raymond said with an annoyed expression on his face.
YOU ARE READING
The Epic Tales Bob and Raymond (Bob x Raymond oneshots)
Roman d'amourA very chill,lazy Bob and a slightly feminine and stylish Raymond doing things together in these wild stories of a relationship that's never going to end.
