Lara

Chapter 1

I was supposed to be born a boy. My name was to be Larimar, like the stone. When I arrived, my parents weren't disappointed, just surprised. My grandmother was the one to name me.

Lara.

She said it was a beautiful and nostalgic name and still paid tribute to her favorite stone. Mémé, as we called my grandmother, had Larimar throughout her house in many forms. Brilliant blue and blue-green tones with white veins running through it. Upon seeing it one couldn't help but be reminded of the sea. Or "la mer" as Mémé would say in her French accent.

Which is where I wish I were right now. I've always loved the ocean, it calms me, makes me feel peaceful. And after the worst day of my life, I could use some peace.

Correction - second worst day of my life. 

The worst day in my twenty-five years here on earth was when Dad died. It's been two years since but doesn't seem that long ago; the pain is still fresh.

A close third would be the day my husband said he wanted a divorce because he wasn't in love with me anymore. And he chose to divorce me six months after Dad passed.

All that to say, today is still knocking the wind out of me.

~*~

Staring into the eyes of the man that has caused all my grief, I inwardly seethe.

What did he just say to me?

"Brett, you can't fire me, I own this company as much as you do! We both built it from the ground up! What are you even talking about?" I shake my head with confusion. "I know I haven't been the easiest to work with since the divorce, I'll acknowledge that. But how would you feel if your high school sweetheart suddenly decided to shack up with some hussy, then had the audacity to date said hussy before the ink even dried on our divorce papers!? I mean really when you think about it, when you really stop to think about it, it's YOU that hasn't been a fucking walk in the park!"

I'm yelling at this point but hear myself as if far away in a tunnel. I've kept so much bottled up in the last year and a half since the divorce for the sake of keeping the peace. But the dam's breaking, and it's ready to spill out uncontrollably.

Noticing my shaking body and clenched fists, Brett quickly moves around his desk to stand in front of me. Placing his hands on my shoulders, he uses his most calming voice - the one he uses on unhappy clients. "Lar, I know this comes as a blow. But this decision isn't personal. It's simply business. The Board is demanding to downsize. You know that. You've seen the numbers."

I did know. The small advertising firm Brett and I had dreamt up in college and started as newlyweds peaked too fast. The success was exhilarating, but staying on top with so much competition was proving impossible. In a joint decision about three months before he left me, we decided Brett should be acting CEO, and I would be acting Manager. It would save on costs and would allow us to bring on needed Board members.

Hindsight is a bitch.

Regardless, Brett's patronizing tone and fake apology are making me see red. "I'll have my lawyers call you in the morning," I manage between clenched teeth. Then turning on my heels I hastily exit his office and make my way out of the building as quickly as possible.

Outside on the street, I pause and feel my stomach clench. This can't be happening, I think while letting out a breath I didn't know I was holding. The pounding in my head starts to subside, and in its place are threatening tears.

Nope! Not going to happen, I tell myself. Get your shit together Lara.

I start to walk mindlessly home then think better of it and order an Uber. Once my ride arrives, I dial my first go-to person - my sister Jade.